


Dust in the Wind

by TellCosy



Series: Blood and Flowers Cycle [2]
Category: Deltarune (Video Game), Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Adult Frisk, Adult Kris, Also the ships will be later and more will be added, Alternate Universe, Anxiety, Blood, Dark, F/F, Gender Issues, HEYOOOO, Horror, Let me just save myself some time and say that all the characters are adults, Multi, Mystery, NB Kris, Nightmares, Old Gods, Other, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Changes, Panic Attacks, Rating will change, Repetition, Second Person, Short Chapters, Since nobody knows what's going to happen, Soft Sequel, Surreal, Suspense, Takes place after the events of Deltarune, Warnings Will Change, Which is fun for me, You can read either by themselves or as a pair, reader is kris
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-01
Updated: 2019-06-22
Packaged: 2019-10-20 09:58:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 22,881
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17620295
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TellCosy/pseuds/TellCosy
Summary: There was a golden flower growing in the field.Golden flowers were Asriel's favourite. He's coming home tomorrow.





	1. Golden

**Author's Note:**

> This one goes fairly whole hog straight from the beginning. Hope you guys like it.

There was a golden flower growing in the field.

A single bud, sitting beneath the canopy of sunflowers that surrounded it.

You crouched down over it, letting your fingers brush along its soft petals. It swayed against your hand, the gentle breeze stirring its scent. You took a deep breath, then let it out in a long sigh.

Golden flowers were Asriel’s favourite.

Your father’s, too.

This one was absolutely beautiful. Perfectly whole and a deep, unblemished gold all through. It almost seemed to reflect the sun back at you, glowing in a way that made you feel a bit breathless.

You hadn’t seen one for years. The ones in your father’s shop had given in to the colder climate just after you’d graduated, even though he was the most skilled gardener around. He’d devised a special mechanism to house them in a controlled environment, just to be able to keep them. They were fragile and didn’t grow in the wild. They had to be cultivated. Encouraged. Nourished.

It had been sad to see them slowly dying bit by bit, kept in stasis but still collapsing, somehow. Death held at bay inch by inch until one morning, you’d come to visit and had found your father standing over their wilted corpses, holding them as though he’d lost something precious.

He’d tried so hard to keep them alive, but it hadn’t been enough.

In the end, even they were beholden to the cycle of life.

But now…

There was one resting against the palm of your hand, the fine hairs on its stem tickling your skin.

Growing in the wild.

Odd.

What a shame that you were the one to find it.

You wondered if you should pick it. Give it to your father.

If you did, it would die.

You could try to transplant it.

You knew a little about how to safely transplant a golden flower. Your dad had mentioned something about it way back when you were still a kid. But he hadn’t gone into detail about it, since, well.

Why bother?

Hm. You supposed you could always call him. Ask _him_ what he thought you should do.

You carefully shifted in your crouch so you could grab your phone from your pocket without tumbling over. The last thing you’d want would be to fall onto the only golden flower you’d ever seen growing in the wild.

It would be just like you, really.

You dialled your dad, propping the phone between your neck and shoulder. It rang and rang and rang, but he didn’t pick up. Typical. He rarely took his phone with him when he left the shop, and he was somewhere in the fields as well. You’d reminded him to take it before offering to gather the sunflowers while he went for the dahlias, but apparently he’d forgotten it anyway.

You gave the flower one last brush of your thumb across the petals before dropping your phone into your hand. You stared down at the numbers in your contact list, fingers gripping the phone tight.

Asriel also knew how to transplant golden flowers.

But he also never answered his phone. He barely even texted. But maybe…

Maybe he would this time.

It was worth a shot.

Right?

Still, you didn’t press the button.

You had a job you needed to get done before dark and the sun was already starting to slant towards the horizon, heavy and hot on your exposed skin.

You would just leave the flower for now.

It wasn’t like it was going to go anywhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up: Kris thinks the stars look brighter than usual.
> 
> Surrender to my tumblr's will!
> 
>  
> 
> [ tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)
> 
>  
> 
> I, uh...I also have a pillowfort under the same name, but I'll be damned if I know how to use it or even looked at it for more than a second, so it's. It's not actually functional. You can still surrender to it, I guess. If you wanna.


	2. Hometown

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nighttime.

The night came too soon.

You stood under the buzzing lamp in the backyard of your mother’s home, shivering in the humid breeze as it chilled the sweat beading down your back. The heat leftover from the sun was still close around you, oppressive and draining. The summer had been long and harsh already, starting much earlier than ever before. You’d been struggling badly with the relentless heat that somehow felt like a personal attack on you.

The thought made you smile.

Asriel had always given you a little thump on the head when you’d said things like that when you were kids. Reminded you that not everything was all about you.

You wondered if he would still do that now that you were both adults or if he’d think it was too childish to even respond to.

Well. You supposed you’d find out soon enough.

“Kris! Dinner’s ready!”

You barely shifted to glance back inside at your mother. She was smiling at something Father Alvin said while she set the table. You let out a tiny puff of air, turning back to look at the night sky again. You wouldn’t go in, and she already knew that. You rarely ate at the table when there were guests, and doubly so when it was Father Alvin.

It wasn’t that you didn’t like him. It was just a little tedious, listening to him try to convince you that you should believe in and follow the Angel’s path every time you saw him, no matter how clear you made it that you weren’t interested.

You did have to have respect for his perseverance, though.

You shook your head slightly, shoving your hands deeper into your pockets and shuffling down the porch steps. You briefly considered just going up to bed early, but you knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep anyway. You’d planned on staying with your father, but he’d been called away at the last minute, so you’d had to give in and agree to stay at your mother’s.

Only, the last time you’d slept in that room…

Well, you just knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep in it.

That was fine, though, because you had a lot of experience with not sleeping at night. You’d never slept well at night. It had been easier, back when Asriel and you were inseparable. You’d managed, at least. It hadn’t really mattered that it was practically impossible without him, though, because you’d had a million things to do in the city no matter the time.

It hadn’t mattered _then_.

But now you were back home.

Hometown.

It was…surreal. Being back.

You’d been away for so many years that you’d forgotten how small it was.

You’d only been back a day and it was already reminding you of why you’d left.

You hadn’t spoken to or seen many people, yet. You weren’t sure if you were relieved or annoyed about that. You felt like you’d maybe fallen somewhere in between.

God, the stars were much brighter than usual.

Or maybe they had always been that bright and you’d just forgotten that, too.

The stars were always so dull in the city. You’d only ever seen them faintly from your home.

…Old home.

It would take some time to get used to that.

Well, you had all the time in the world, now.

Whether you wanted it or not.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up: Kris questions.
> 
> Tumblin' with myself, oh-oh, tumblin' with myself...
> 
> [ tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	3. Change or

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Had you?

“so. you’re back, huh?”

You glanced over at Sans, your hair blocking half your view of him. You pushed it back with one hand, the wooden crate of flowers you were packing groceries into balancing on your hip. You were filling in for your father at the flower shop and you’d run out of jars and ribbons for the arrangements. You’d cursed yourself for not making sure you’d had the proper amount of supplies when you realised that you’d have to go to the grocery store.

You’d been enjoying the solitude and concentration that the task had offered and had known there was no way for it to continue once you ventured out. You may have been able to avoid seeing anyone when traveling through the town after dark, but you stood no chance during the day.

Predictably, despite keeping your head down and walking quickly, you’d been called over three times to talk to one of your old classmates or their relatives. They’d talked and talked and talked at you about all the little things that had happened in the town, never once asking how you’d been these past twelve years. You’d nodded and hummed and smiled where necessary, trying not to feel itchy with impatience.

It wasn’t that you weren’t interested. You just had a lot to do and you hadn’t really prepared yourself to be bombarded with information about people you hadn’t spoken to in a decade. And when they all inevitably asked you about Asriel and how he was doing and wasn’t he supposed to come back today and they missed him so much—that was when you made your escape.

You might be willing to at least pretend like you were okay with being back while they talked about themselves, but Asriel was where you drew the line.

God, nothing had changed.

It drained you deeply somehow, knowing that. So by the time you trudged up to the counter at the store, crate laden with jam jars and rolls of ribbon and some extra bits of food, you were already too exhausted to reply to Sans’s query. You just nodded, sliding over the gold for the items and hoisting the crate higher with a quiet sigh. If you were going to keep helping your dad, you would really have to find a better way to carry stuff around. The rough wood was digging into your hand, threatening to splinter.

“don’t seem very excited about it,” Sans commented casually as he got your change. “aren’t you happy you’re back?” His eyes focused on you in a way that made you suddenly irritated and you shook your head at the pennies he offered. His smile widened. “suit yourself.”

You forced yourself to leave at a normal pace, ignoring Sans’s pointed, “welcome back, kris.”

Hm. Welcome back, indeed.

On your way home, you cut through alleys and around into the fields instead of risking being seen by anybody else. You tried not to think about why you were avoiding everyone, knowing that you wouldn’t be doing yourself any favours by dwelling on it.

Maybe Hometown hadn’t changed, but you had.

You dropped the crate onto the front counter once you’d gotten inside the shop and locked the door behind you. There was a thought scratching at the back of your mind. You were trying your best to just—you had a lot of work to do and you didn’t—

You didn’t want to think it.

You didn’t want to think it, but no matter how many arrangements you made, or how much you tidied, or how vigorously you made dinner, it wormed and dug and pressed at the walls you constructed around it until—

…Hadn’t you?

You stood over the sink, washing up after yourself and putting the dishes away.

You’d…changed. Hadn’t you?

Your hands trembled despite the burn of the water and the intensity of the setting sun on your face.

Hadn’t you changed?

You stopped, taking deep, calming breaths that did not calm you enough. You should really—

Had you?

You had only just gotten back home. Not even a whole day. You should try to focus on—

Had you changed at all?

Your hands yanked the plug out of the sink involuntarily. You watched the water spiral down the drain as you clutched the sides of the counter.

Had you changed at all?

Hometown was the same.

Nothing had changed.

You realised you could see bright white spots in your eyes and dragged a breath through your teeth, tearing your eyes away from the empty sink as you tasted metal at the back of your throat.

Asriel would be home soon.

Nothing had changed.

You didn’t know—

You should—

You should go pick some flowers for him.

He would like it.

He used to.

He used to—

You left out the back of the shop, hands dripping onto the already-wet grass. Your feet slipped on the hills and stuck into muddy burrows, but you made it with only a few new scratches. You barely noticed them as you pushed into the field of sunflowers, letting yourself disappear beneath their upturned faces. Here, you couldn’t hear yourself think. You could only hear the sway of the stems and leaves in the wind. You could only feel the sun filtered through petals, soft and quiet. You could only smell the wet earth underfoot.

Nothing else.

You’d come here often as a kid, too. It had worked, even back then. Sometimes you’d be sitting in class or church or with your brother’s friends and you’d just found yourself standing up and running to this place.

You were surprised to find that you still had that instinct.

Surprised, and nervous.

It was all the same.

Everything except…

As you pushed through into a small, familiar clearing, the setting sun beat down on you, glistening off of a small, blooming—

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up: change or...
> 
> This tumblr might be a good place to find some ingredients...
> 
> [ tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	4. No Change

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Go** l **den**

There was a gol **d** en fl **o** wer growi **n** g in **t** he **f** ield.

A single bud, sitting beneath the can **o** py of sunflowe **r** s that surrounded it.

You crouched down over it, lettin **g** your fing **e** rs brush along i **t** s soft petals. It swaye **d** against y **o** ur ha **n** d, **t** he gentle breeze stirring its scent. You took a deep breath, then let it out in a long sigh.

Golden **f** l **o** we **r** s were Asriel’s favourite.

Your father’s, too.

This one was absolutely beautiful. Perfectly whole and a deep, unblemished **g** old all through. It almost s **e** emed **t** o reflect the sun back at you, glowing in a way that ma **d** e y **o** u feel a bit breathless.

You had **n** ’ **t** seen one **for** years. The ones in your father’s shop had **g** iv **e** n in **t** o the col **d** er climate just after y **o** u’d graduated, eve **n** **t** hough he was the most skilled gardener around. He’d devised a special mechanism to house them in a controlled environment, just to be able to keep them. They were **f** ragile and didn’t gr **o** w in the wild. They had to be cultivated. Encou **r** a **ge** d. Nourished.

I **t** ha **d** been sad t **o** see them slowly dyi **n** g bi **t** by bit, kept in stasis but still collapsing, somehow. Death held at bay inch by inch until one morning, you’d come to visit and had **fo** und you **r** father standin **g** ov **e** r **t** heir wilte **d** c **o** rpses, holdi **n** g **t** hem as though he’d lost something precious.

He’d tried so hard to keep them alive, but it hadn’t been enough.

In the end, even they were beholden to the cycle o **f** life.

But n **o** w…

The **r** e was one restin **g** against th **e** palm of your hand, **t** he fine hairs on its stem tickling your skin.

Growing in the wil **d**.

**O** dd.

What a shame that you were the o **n** e **t** o **f** ind it.

Y **o** u wonde **r** ed if you should pick it. **G** iv **e** i **t** to your father.

If you **d** id, it w **o** uld die.

You could try to tra **n** splan **t** it.

You knew a little about how to sa **f** ely transplant a g **o** lden flowe **r**. Your dad had mentioned somethin **g** about it way back wh **e** n you were s **t** ill a ki **d**. But he hadn’t g **on** e in **t** o detail about it, since, well.

Why bother?

Hm. You supposed you could always call him. Ask _him_ what he thought you should do.

You care **f** ully shifted in y **o** u **r** crouch so you could **g** rab your phon **e** from your pocke **t** without tumbling over. The last thing you’ **d** want w **o** uld be to fall o **nt** o the only golden **f** l **o** we **r** you’d ever seen **g** rowing in th **e** wild.

I **t** woul **d** be just like y **o** u, really.

You dialled your dad, proppi **n** g **t** he phone between your neck and shoulder. It rang and rang and rang, but he didn’t pick up. Typical. He rarely took his phone with him when he le **f** t the sh **o** p, and he was somewhe **r** e in the fields as well. You’d reminded him to take it before offerin **g** to gath **e** r **t** he sunflowers while he went for the **d** ahlias, but apparently he’d f **o** rgotte **n** i **t** anyway.

You gave the **f** l **o** we **r** one last brush of your thumb across the petals before droppin **g** your phon **e** in **t** o your han **d**. Y **o** u stared dow **n** a **t** the numbers in your contact list, **f** ingers gripping the ph **o** ne tight.

As **r** iel also knew how to transplant **g** old **e** n flowers.

Bu **t** he also never answere **d** his ph **on** e. He barely even **t** exted. But maybe…

Maybe he would this time.

It was worth a shot.

Right?

Still, you didn’t press the button.

You had a job you needed to get done be **for** e dark and the sun was already startin **g** to slant towards th **e** horizon, heavy and ho **t** on your exposed skin.

You would just leave the flower for now.

It wasn’t like it was going to go anywhere.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Ne** x **t** up: **D** a **d**.
> 
> [ **te** llc **o** sy. **t** umbl **r**.c **o** m ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	5. Dad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Was that your name?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who's given this a chance. ^v^ <3 Love you guys!

You found your father back at the shop, frowning down at a pile of papers.

When he saw you struggling through the door with the crate of flowers you’d collected, he rushed over and snatched it up, chuckling.

“Look at you, still trying to take the world on on your own!”

You gave him an indulgent smile as you gratefully shifted the crate into his massive arms, ignoring the twinge of discomfort at the back of your mind. He didn’t know. He wasn’t saying it on purpose. Better to just change the subject.

Before you could, though, he lumbered into the back room to put the flowers away, saying over his shoulder,

“These are great, honey! They’ll be perfect for the arrangements. Knew it was a good idea to get your help. You and your brother always had a real eye for this stuff. Shame I couldn’t convince him to stay.”

You grunted noncommittally at the sound of his chuckles, drifting absently towards the counter. You were thirsty after lugging that crate back home and you’d left a bottle of soda back there specifically for when you returned. Your father never kept anything but water and sometimes juice in the house, and you had a sweeter tooth than that. Before you could grab it, though, your eye caught on the papers. Some were just the usual—overdue bills and rent notices—but sitting amongst them was a handwritten letter there with your name on it.

You frowned slightly. Why was someone writing a letter to your father about you?

You started to lean over it, but before you could see anything else, your dad pushed back through the door to the front, dusting the pollen off his hands. Or he tried to, at least—his fur was stained yellow with it. You smiled as he grumbled good-naturedly.

“I know, I know, I can’t complain because I didn’t use the gloves.”

Your smile widened, but before you could even start to tease him about it, the phone rang. God, was that thing loud. You winced, turning away and busying yourself with tidying up the shop as your dad hurried to answer the phone. You listened to his half of the conversation absently, already occupied with sweeping the dust and mud that you’d tracked in from outside. After saying hello, he greeted the person warmly, so you could only assume he knew them. You tried to remember if you knew that name anywhere, but it slid right out of your head.

It was unlikely you knew them, anyway. You’d been away for so long that you were surprised you recognised anyone anymore.

Oh. Wait. Hm. You hadn’t really thought about the fact that everyone might not recognise _you_.

That was an odd thought.

So was the brief wonder if they had missed you at all.

At least you knew for sure that your father had missed you. He was always forthcoming with his emotions, which was sometimes difficult for you, but right now was a blessing. You had enough to think about without having to decipher if he was wishing you’d never showed up or not.

Or not think about, as it were.

Well, no, that wouldn’t do. The whole point of you coming back was to think about it, wasn’t it?

The trick, you figured, was to just keep that knowledge that at least one person remembered you, even after everything.

Your dad had always been good with that.

Remembering.

And if you had that, you could do anything.

“Yes. It’s no problem at all. Glad to help. See you later, then.”

You glanced up at your dad as he hung up the phone, his face a mix of emotions. After a second where he simply stood, staring into space, he turned to you with a slight, grimacing smile. You raised your eyebrows in question and he heaved out a sigh, saying,

“I’m sorry, Kris. I know you just got here and I know I promised you a nice welcome back dinner, but there’s something—something’s come up. Someone needs my help.”

You blinked in surprise and your dad cleared his throat, ruffling the fur at the back of his neck as he turned to scoop up the pile of papers. The pollen stain on his hands spread to everything he touched.

“You know I wouldn’t go if it wasn’t important, right, kiddo?”

When he looked back at you with an apologetic smile, you took a slow breath and nodded. Sure, it wasn’t nice that he had to go, but you weren’t a kid anymore. You could take care of yourself.

“Right. I’d—better go, then,” he mumbled, checking his pockets for his keys and taking the cell phone you pointed out to him. He hesitated at the door. “I really am sorry about the dinner. I was just about to go pick some things up from the store to get a start on it, so there…isn’t anything in the fridge.”

You waved a hand to let him know that you would be fine.

“If you—I know you said you didn’t want to, but—if you can’t figure out what to make yourself, you know your mother would be happy to have you over.”

You tensed, your hand gripping the broom handle tight enough to make your knuckle pop.

“Just—please think about it,” your dad said with a tiny, concerned smile. “You know how your old dad worries about you.”

You forced yourself to relax enough to nod again.

He didn’t know.

He was just worried about you.

“Anyway, I’d better go. See you tomorrow, Kris,” he said, ducking to leave. Just before he closed the door behind himself, though, he paused and peeked back in to say with an enormous smile, “And hey, maybe by the time I get back, Asriel will be home again and we can all have dinner together! Wouldn’t that be great?”

Another nod. Your smile and throat were tight.

Yeah. It would be great.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up: the moon is bright.
> 
> Paper! Snow! My tumblr!
> 
> [ tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	6. Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts under the bright light of the moon.

The night came too soon.

You stood under the buzzing lamp in the backyard of your mother’s home, shivering in the humid breeze as it chilled the sweat beading down your back. The heat leftover from the sun was still close around you, oppressive and draining. The summer had been long and harsh already, starting much earlier than ever before. You’d been struggling badly with the relentless heat that somehow felt like a personal attack on you.

The thought made you smile, but—

But why did it seem so familiar?

You shivered again, as though your body was trying to shake off a bad feeling. Your skin wouldn’t stop prickling, no matter how hot you were. Or maybe it _was_ the heat that caused it. Either way, you were desperately uncomfortable.

Maybe you’d caught something.

Ugh, of _course_ you’d caught something on your first day back. You had the worst luck. Anything that _could_ go wrong in your life always had.

You sniffled, holding your arms around yourself as you gazed into the moon. Asriel had always given you a little thump on the head when you’d said things like that when you were kids. Reminded you that—

You shook and shook at the feeling of familiarity, swallowing heavily.

_Why_ were you so shaky?

You wondered if he would still do that now that you were both adults or if he’d think it was too childish to even respond to.

…What?

Why had you thought that?

Well. You supposed you’d find out soon enough.

You—you hadn’t meant to think that.

“Kris! Dinner’s ready!”

You swung around to look back inside at your mother. She was smiling at something Father Alvin said while she set the table. You dragged a sharp breath into your lungs as they both turned to look at you through the window. You held a hand over your heart to calm it down, turning back to look at the night sky again. You wouldn’t go in. She already knew that. Even if you weren’t feeling sick, you rarely ate at the table when there were guests. Doubly so when it was Father Alvin.

It wasn’t that you didn’t like him. You just _hated_ hearing about the fucking _Angel_ and its _Path_ _of_ _Light and Dark_ every two seconds when all you wanted was a little goddamn _peace_!

You stumbled down the stairs, shaking your head roughly to clear the sudden anger from you. You wondered if you should go up to bed early, but that was a _bad idea_. You’d planned on staying with your father for a reason.

Because the last time you’d slept in that room, you’d—

Well, you just knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep in it.

That was fine, though, because you had a lot of experience with not sleeping. You’d never _really_ slept. It had been easier to pretend, back when Asriel and you were inseparable. After he’d left you, you’d had to figure out another way to do things, and that had ended up with you sleeping only when the sun was out. You couldn’t stand the dark. You couldn’t bear it. Couldn’t rest when bathed by the shadows.

Thank God the city never really got very dark.

You—you didn’t—you didn’t want to think about it.

But now you were back home.

Hometown.

Your whole world felt tilted.

You’d been away for so many years that you’d forgotten how small it was.

Or was it just who had changed?

You’d only been back a day and it was already reminding you of why you’d left.

There was always something about this place.

You hadn’t spoken to or seen many people, yet, though. Maybe you’d feel better once you had. Or maybe—

You weren’t sure if you were relieved or annoyed about that abandoned thought. You felt like you’d maybe fallen somewhere in between.

God, the moon was bright enough to burn your eyes.

Or maybe it had always been that bright and you’d just forgotten that, too.

You’d never really seen the moon from your home in the city.

…Old home.

It would take some time to get used to that.

Well, you had all the time in the world, now.

_Whether you wanted it or not_.

You thought you might choke at the sudden realisation, especially when you also saw that you had somehow ended up back in the flower fields. You tucked your hands tight between your arms and your body, trying to keep them from shaking. It was somehow colder, here. Cold enough to make you feel feverish.

You wandered through the fields, keeping your eyes turned up towards the lamp of the moon. If you kept looking at it, you could pretend like you weren’t out in the dark. You could pretend like you’d just come out here to play hide and seek, like you used to as a kid. You could pretend like you weren’t—

Oh. What—what was that?

There, sitting in a small clearing under a canopy of sunflowers with shadows so tall they made it look silver.

It wasn’t silver, though.

It was

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up: again.
> 
> My tumblr likes to party. It likes, it likes to party.
> 
> [ tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	7. Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Again

a gol **d** en fl **o** wer growi **n** g in **t** he **f** ield.

A single bud, sitting beneath the can **o** py of sunflowe **r** s that surrounded it.

You crouched down over it, lettin **g** your fing **e** rs brush along i **t** s soft petals. It swaye **d** against y **o** ur ha **n** d, **t** he gentle breeze stirring its scent. You don’t take a deep breath, then let it out in a long sigh.

Golden **f** l **o** we **r** s were Asriel’s favourite.

Your father’s, too.

This one was absolutely beautiful. Perfectly whole and a deep, unblemished **g** old all through. It almost s **e** emed **t** o reflect the sun back at you, glowing in a way that ma **d** e y **o** u feel a bit breathless.

You forget you had **n** ’ **t** seen one **for** years. The ones in your father’s shop had **g** iv **e** n in **t** o the col **d** er climate just after y **o** u’d graduated, eve **n** **t** hough he was the most skilled gardener around. He’d devised a special mechanism to house them in a controlled environment, just to be able to keep them. They are **f** ragile; don’t forget to gr **o** w them in the wild. They had to be cultivated. Don’t encou **r** a **ge** them. Forget nourishing them.

I **t** ha **d** been sad t **o** see them slowly dyi **n** g bi **t** by bit, kept in stasis but still collapsing, somehow. Death held at bay inch by inch until one morning, you’d come to visit and had **fo** und you **r** father standin **g** ov **e** r **t** heir wilte **d** c **o** rpses, holdi **n** g **t** hem as though he’d lost something precious.

He’d tried so hard to keep them alive, but don’t forget that it hadn’t been enough.

In the end, even they were beholden to the cycle o **f** life.

But n **o** w…

The **r** e was one restin **g** against th **e** palm of your hand, **t** he fine hairs on its stem tickling your skin.

Growing in the wil **d**.

**O** dd.

What a shame that you were the o **n** e **t** o **f** ind it.

Y **o** u don’t wonde **r** if you should pick it. You forget to **g** iv **e** i **t** to your father.

If you **do** n’t, it will die.

You could try to tra **n** splan **t** it.

You don’t know anything about how to sa **f** ely transplant a g **o** lden flowe **r**. Your dad will forget to mention somethin **g** about it way back wh **e** n you are s **t** ill a ki **d**. But he hadn’t g **on** e in **t** o detail about it, since, well.

Don’t forget.

Hm. You don’t suppose you could always forget to call him. Don’t ask _him_ what he thinks you should do.

You forget to care **f** ully shift in y **o** u **r** crouch so you could **g** rab your phon **e** from your pocke **t** , and almost tumble over. You don’t forget, the next time. The last thing you’ **d** want w **o** uld be to fall o **nt** o the only golden **f** l **o** we **r** you’d ever seen **g** rowing in th **e** wild.

I **t** woul **d** be just like y **o** u, really.

You don’t forget to dial your dad, proppi **n** g **t** he phone between your neck and shoulder. It rang and rang and rang, but he didn’t pick up. Typical. He rarely took his phone with him when he le **f** t the sh **o** p, and he was somewhe **r** e in the fields as well. You don’t forget that you reminded him to take it before offerin **g** to gath **e** r **t** he sunflowers while he went for the **d** ahlias, but apparently he’d f **o** rgotte **n** i **t** anyway.

You don’t forget to give the **f** l **o** we **r** one last brush of your thumb across the petals before droppin **g** your phon **e** in **t** o your han **d**. Y **o** u don’t stare dow **n** a **t** the numbers in your contact list, **f** ingers gripping the ph **o** ne tight.

You forget that As **r** iel also knew how to transplant **g** old **e** n flowers.

Bu **t** he also never answere **d** his ph **on** e. He barely even **t** exted. But maybe…

Maybe he would this time.

It was worth a shot.

Right?

Still, you didn’t press the button.

You had a job you needed to get done be **for** e dark and the sun was already startin **g** to slant towards th **e** horizon, heavy and ho **t** on your exposed skin.

You don’t forget to just leave the flower for now.

It wasn’t like it was going to go anywhere.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Ne** x **t** up: **t** h **e** wh **ee** l **t** u **r** ns **f** as **ter**.
> 
>  
> 
> [ **te** llc **o** sy. **t** umbl **r**.c **o** m ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	8. You Forgot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember  
> Remember  
> Remember  
> Remember

“back again, huh?”

You froze, the crate in your hands slipping enough to send splinters jabbing into your palm. You barely noticed the pain as you looked all around you wildly.

The store. You were at the store. How did you get to the store?

You didn’t remember walking to the store.

Why were you there?

You were standing in the middle of an aisle, facing the counter and holding a crate full of sunflowers. Sans was watching you with his head propped up on a crooked arm. It was nearing sunset outside.

Had you…had you brought the flowers there instead of your father’s shop?

Was that what he’d asked you to do? Why would he have asked you to bring them to Sans? Sans never sold flowers. That was your father’s business.

You stared down at the cut flowers, your mouth going dry.

You couldn’t remember cutting them.

“forget whatcha came here for, huh?”

You startled badly, your elbow banging into a shelf. You stared at Sans with wide eyes before they caught on the calendar hanging behind him.

Oh, God.

You hadn’t come straight from the flower field at all.

You’d lost a whole day.

You’d forgotten a _whole day_.

Your vision began to narrow.

“kid? you okay?”

Asriel would be home soon.

“kris.”

You tried to swallow, but your throat was sticky and tight. Your eyes burned and watered as you hiccuped air into your lungs.

It was happening again.

Oh, God, it was happening _again_.

You had to get out of there.

You only realised that you’d dropped the crate when you kicked it in your flight from the shop, scattering flowers across your path. They crunched underfoot in a way that made you recoil, sending you bumbling into the person coming in the door. You fell back with an apology on your tongue, but the person spoke first.

“Hi, Kris! Been a while! Whoops, don’t forget your mail!”

You couldn’t even begin to form the question, but they didn’t need you to ask. They bent down and grabbed a stack of papers, handing them out to you. You stared down at them, shaking your head. It wasn’t your mail. You’d never seen it before.

“Well, aren’t you gonna take it? It got your name on it!” They laughed, giving the papers a wiggle before leaning in to whisper conspiratorially, “Did you forget your own name or something?”

Your eyes were drawn to the papers. You didn’t want to look.

Your hand started to lift, reaching to take them.

You—you had to get out of there. You had to go.

So you did.

You ducked around the shop door and flew down the street, ignoring the shout of your name behind you.

“Kris! Where are you going in such a hurry? Forget something important?”

Your stomach twisted and gnawed at itself in shame as you barrelled through town, desperate not to meet anybody’s eyes as they called out to you.

“Hey Kris! Don’t forget about Asriel’s homecoming party tonight!”

Why? Why should you be ashamed? You didn’t do anything wrong.

“Kris, if you’re going to run off again, don’t forget to tell your mother where you’re at! You know how worried she gets!”

You just wanted to live your life.

“Don’t forget to finish those arrangements for your father, Kris! He’s really counting on you!”

You’d come back after all this time and nothing had changed. You’d done so well in the city but there you were Kris and here—here you were still K-R-I-S and you— _you_ were—

You were in the sunflower field.

And there—

Calling out to you—

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next up: again.
> 
> Riff raff...street rat...my tumblr's full of that
> 
> [ tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	9. Again Again Again

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Remember Me Remember Me Remember Me  
> Remember Me Remember Me Remember Me  
> Remember Me Remember Me Remember Me  
> Remember Me Remember Me Remember Me

There was a gol **d** en fl **o** wer growi **n** g in **t** he **f** ield.

A single bud, sitting beneath the can **o** py of sunflowe **r** s that surrounded it.

You crouched down over it, lettin **g** your fing **e** rs brush along i **t** s soft petals.

, **t** he gentle breeze stirring its scent. You don’t take a deep breath, then let it out in a long sigh.

DGoonltdfeonr g **fe** lt **od** woen **rt** sf owregreetfavourite.

Your father’s, too.

Perfectly whole and a deep, duonnbtlfeomrigsehteddo n **gt** oflodr gaeltl through. It almost s **e** emed **t** o reflect the dsounnt back at you,glowingma **d** e y **o** u feel a bit fborregaetthless.

You forget you had **n** ’ **t** see in your father’s shop had **g** iv **e** n in **t** o the col **d** e he was the most skilled gardener around. He’dmechanism to house them in

to gr **o** w them in the wild. They had to be dcounlttfiovragteetd. Don’t deonnctofuo **rr** ag **geet** them. Forget nourishing them.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

doofn tyfoourrg ehtadnodn,t f **to** hreg eftidnoen thfaoirrgse todno nittfso rsgteetmd otnitcfkolrignegt your skin.

Growing in the wil **d**.

**O** dd.

What a shame

Y **o** u don’t wonde **r** if you should pick it. You dontforget to **g** iv **e** i **t** to your father.

, it will die.

You could try to tra **n** splan **t** it.

 

, since, well.

Don’t forget.

Hm. You don’t suppose you could always forget to call him. Don’t ask _him_ what he thinks you should do.

You crouch so , and almost tumble over. You don’t forget, the next time. 

I **t** woul **d** be just like y **o** u, really.

 

 

 

p, and he was somewhe **r** e in the fields as well.

 

dsounntffloorwgeerts **d** ahlias,

he’d f **o** rgotte **n**.

one last brush of your thumb across the petals

. numbers in your contact list .

You forget 

Bu **t** he also never . He barely even . But maybe…

Maybe he would this time.

 

 

Still, you didn’t press the button.

be **for** e dark the sun was, heavy and ho **t** on your exposed skin.

You DON’T LEAVE DON’T LEAVE DON’T LEAVE DON’T LEAVE DON’T LEAVE the flower for now.

 

 

DIOtN TwFaOsRnG’EtT DlOiNkTeF OiRtG EwTaDsO NgToFiOnRgG EtTo

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You forgot


	10. A New Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Or are they an old friend?

You clutched your head as it spun and spun and spun, dropping to your knees beside the flower. You gasped and coughed, trying to force the hot, wet air into your tight chest but it just—it just wouldn’t—

You fell forward, catching yourself before you crashed to the ground. Your arms trembled weakly as your vision wobbled, barely able to keep yourself even in a crouch. A rolling spasm wracked your body from toe to top and back again, your teeth clacking angrily.

And through it all, the face of the flower pressed against yours, heady and sweet.

You lolled to the side, falling hard on your hip as you wrenched at the base of the flower’s stem and threw it to the other side of the clearing, choking out,

“What—do you _want_ from me? What? _What_?”

The flower lay where you left it, sad and broken.

You laid there staring into the setting sun and trying to piece yourself back together for longer than you realised. The counting of breaths, the sharp press of lead to your fingertips, one by one, the rush of blood in your ears, the beat—beat—beat of your heart, louder than ever in the crushing silence. A rhythm to stitch you back to the you who had escaped this place.

When you opened your eyes again, the sun was kissing your other cheek.

A shiver ran through you, although the ground was already warm.

The heads of the sunflowers swayed above you, their faces dancing around each other to peek down at you. You watched them, your eyes drooping with exhaustion. There was something hypnotic about them. You could almost imagine they were whispering down at you, greeting you in excitement for the new day.

Almost.

…More than almost.

You _could_ hear whispering.

You froze at first, your heartbeat almost too loud in your ears to know if you had imagined it or not.

_Almost_.

You hadn’t imagined it at all.

There _was_ whispering. Tiny, breathless, and fast. Whispers that seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere.

You held your breath and lifted yourself onto your elbows, eyes flitting around the small clearing.

No one. You couldn’t see anyone around you, and now the whispers had stopped.

Was someone playing a prank on you again?

Had Asriel—

There it was again.

You leapt to your feet, ready to chase after whoever it was who thought they could scare _you_ , but when you did, the whispers grew quiet.

Quiet, but not gone.

It took you several moments to piece together what that meant, and when you did, you almost wish you hadn’t.

You turned around slowly, a knot in your gut.

You bent down closer to the ground again, inch by inch.

The whispers grew louder.

Louder.

There was a hole where the flower had been before.

The whispers were coming from it.

You were close enough now that you could almost make out words in them. But the harder you listened, the harder your breath came, the faster your blood rushed. They sounded like words. They _sounded_ like words, but there weren’t any words you knew.

You wanted to run away.

From the whispers. From Hometown. From whatever it was that was happening to you.

But instead, your lips moved and you whispered back,

“Hello?”

As soon as you spoke, the whispers stopped.

You weren’t sure if that was comforting or if it made you feel worse.

Were you just imagining them? Had you just responded to a hallucination?

You swallowed reflexively, licking your dry lips.

You should really just go.

There was nothing good that could come out of this.

You’d promised you wouldn’t do this again.

But…

This was _different_.

Nothing was ever different in Hometown.

Every time something had happened, it had been _you_ who’d made it happen.

_Had_ you made this?

But it—it was daytime.

The sun was shining.

How could you have done this if you weren’t—

“Hello.”

You drew back so fast that you slipped on the wet grass and knocked the wind out of yourself. You took several long moments to get your breath and heartbeat under control, just staring down at the hole.

How—

Someone had _talked_.

That wasn’t your imagination. It _couldn’t_ be.

Although. Although it _had_ sounded oddly familiar.

You didn’t know if hallucination should be taken off of the table completely, especially when you shifted to examine the hole properly.

It was at once small and yet alarmingly large. Big enough only for your fist to reach into if you flattened your hand out, and under normal circumstances, you’d think nothing of it. Probably just a snake tunnel or an animal’s burrow; as natural as the sky.

But this had opened up underneath a flower. A _Golden_ _flower_.

What kind of flower grew over a gaping hole?

How had it gripped the soil so tight that you’d struggled to tear it up?

You frowned down into the hole, leaning over it. It was dark in there. Very, very dark. Dark enough that even if you were stupid enough to try to reach into it to see if you could feel something, you wouldn’t be able to see _what_ you had touched.

No, thanks.

“If you are not going to talk, could you please lean back again? It’s just that you’re blocking the sun.”

You froze for a second as you processed both the sound of the voice—soft, dark, and smooth, like chocolate ganache pouring over a cake—as well as the words it had said. When they finally clicked, you moved quickly, letting the light through once more.

“Thank you.”

“You’re…welcome.”

There was a satisfied sigh from below so small that you wouldn’t have heard it if you weren’t only inches from the hole. You were buzzing with questions, all of them cramming forward to be asked at once. You shook your head to clear them. You shouldn’t be asking questions to _holes in the ground_ in the first place.

But— “Who are you? How—why—are you under the ground? Are you okay? Are you—”

Are you real?

You couldn’t ask that.

If they weren’t, they would insist they were, and if they were, they would think that you were untrustworthy for asking.

Untrustworthy?

_God_. If they were real, _they_ were the one living in a hole. You shouldn’t have to worry about which one of you was coming across more unhinged.

Oh.

Oh, it had just hit you that you were crouched down on your hands and knees in the mud, talking to someone in a hole.

You should probably go.

Just as you leaned back to leave, though, the voice spoke again.

“I’m well, thank you. And you?”

You blinked. You hadn’t noticed before, but the way the voice spoke was strangely old-fashioned. And so familiar that it was distracting you. “I—I’m alright. I could…be better, I guess.”

“You guess?”

You glanced around you, feeling as though there should be someone or something there to help you with this, but it was still only you. You took a few deep breaths, trying to decide if you were really going to do this.

You knew you shouldn’t. You didn’t have a great track record with this sort of thing.

“Hello? Are you still there?”

But your curiosity had always gotten the best of you.

And this was different.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’m still here.”

“Oh, good.”

“I’m just a little…this isn’t usual for me.”

“Nor for me.”

“So you—you _live_ down there? Underground?”

“I live in Underground, yes.”

Something about the way they worded it made you pause.

“ _In_ underground?”

“It is what our king named it.” There was a second of silence before a breathy laugh drifted to your ears. You shook your head to clear the ping of deja vu that overwhelmed you. “Believe me, we tried to convince him otherwise once it was rebuilt, but to no avail. And so Underground it remains.”

Your head was spinning. A _king_?

“Yes. We have a king and queen. Although they don’t rule so much as settle disagreements.”

You tensed, biting your lips between your teeth.

You—you hadn’t asked that out loud.

Had you?

“How did—how did you—”

“Get down here? We were locked away years ago. Have you not read the interviews? I would have thought that everyone would know by now.”

The more the voice spoke, the more questions you had. You felt dizzy.

Your brain was grasping at who they could be, but every time you almost remembered, it slipped away.

“No, there’s—there’s no interviews. That I’ve seen. But we’re only a small town. Maybe—in the city, there might have—”

No, there wasn’t. You had _never_ heard of an underground kingdom in the mountain.

That seemed like something that would have made front page if there had been interviews, but what did you know?

You were just a person who was obviously losing their grip on reality.

Again.

Your head was pounding.

You’d thought you’d gotten better.

Obviously not.

You were breaking out in a sweat.

You looked down to your phone.

It was probably time to get her help.

“Hm. Odd.”

“You’re telling me,” you muttered to yourself, laughter bubbling up. “I’m sorry I haven’t heard of you.”

“Don’t be. Perhaps…perhaps it is better, this way.”

“If it’s any consolation, no one knows who I am, either.”

Another laugh came, soft and amused. “Well, there’s one way to remedy that.”

It took you a second to catch on, and when you did, you gnawed at your cheek in uncertainty.

You weren’t good with names.

“Would you feel more comfortable if I gave you my name first?”

Your breath caught.

“No,” you whispered, your memory sparking in a way that made you wince. “But I want to know, anyway.”

“If you’d like, you can call me by my old name, Fleur. But I don’t go by that name anymore. Not for a long, long time. My friends have always known me by another name.”

Your heart was racing.

The sun beat down on you, hot and blinding.

You didn’t know why, but you felt like your whole world was unraveling.

“Do you want to be my friend?”

No. No. Say no.

But you couldn’t, because the truth was, “Yes. I do.”

“How should I refer to you?”

“Kris. My name is Kris.”

You could almost hear the smile in the voice’s words as they whispered up to you,

“It’s wonderful to meet you, Kris. My name is Frisk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! This is the sequel to Moths :D
> 
> This is the end of the prologue chapters, so updates will come a bit slower now, since they'll be longer. Should be, at least heh heh heh ^^;;
> 
> Next up: the cavalry arrives.
> 
> There's a snake in my tumblr!
> 
>  
> 
> [ tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	11. Hero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A mean girl enters the scene.

You reread the text from Kris one more time, your phone digging into your palm.

You were right.

That was all it said.

Just ‘You were right.’

And no matter how many times you texted or called, that was all that remained. They hadn’t sent a single response back or answered any of your calls, despite the increasing frequency of both. You refreshed all your socials and checked your call log repeatedly, hoping against hope that you’d just missed something.

Nada.

Goddammit.

The streetlight flashed yellow ahead of you and you shoved your phone away again, flipping the visor of your helmet down as it changed to green. Your bike’s engine rumbled a warning at you as you revved it hard to get in front of traffic, gunning straight for the mountain.

You hadn’t missed the sight of it one bit.

It was beautiful, sure. And you had some good memories of living on it. But the bad memories outweighed the good by a lot. You’d made a bunch more good ones once you and your friends had gotten the hell out of there, and you wished you could have kept making them.

But a little while ago, Noelle had had to go back for a family emergency, and everything had gone downhill from there. She’d gone practically radio silent from the moment after she’d texted that she’d arrived. You and Kris had been worried about her, but you’d made it your business to distract them from it. They hadn’t needed anything else to fret about, really. They worried for the world, that kid.

You’d done a good job of distracting them, too, until the nightmares had started.

First yours, where you dreamt you were back home. Your _original_ home.

Those hadn’t been great.

But then Kris had begun sleeping poorly even during the day and you’d taken them to get help. There was a doctor in the depths of the city that already knew that Kris wasn’t exactly…normal. She didn’t know the half of it, but enough to not question why both of you were firmly insistent on no sleeping pills even after she explained that it would be purely for use until their natural sleep cycle was restored.

So instead she referred them to a psych.

You’d _known_ it had been a bad idea. Kris had known, too. But they were getting desperate. They’d still had their job, back then, and they’d wanted to keep it.

Some good it had done them to go.

Oh well.

You would just have to fix it, as usual. You’d known you would have to, but you hadn’t said anything to Kris when they’d told you that their psych thought it would be a good idea to return to Hometown.

For closure.

To help them remember what they’d forgotten.

To reconnect with their past.

Bullshit.

None of those things were _good_ for Kris. They were much happier now. But you hadn’t said anything. You’d just given them a look and had hoped they’d see sense.

God, you wished you’d said something.

They’d been determined, though, and even though you’d seen that they were terrified, you’d taken that to be the good kind of terrified. Back then, at least.

Then they’d gone quiet, too.

Too quiet.

Neither Noelle nor Kris would answer their phone.

A week passed.

Two.

And then _finally_ , at the end of the third week—this.

Just this.

Well fuck that.

You weren’t going to sit around and let your friends get into trouble without you to back them up.

You glared over at the sun as it slanted to blind you and held a hand up to block it. God, it was a persistent bastard. It felt like your whole journey had been headed directly for it, no matter how fast you rode or how many turns you took.

At least you knew it would be smooth sailing on the way back.

And there _would_ be a way back.

There was no way you were going to leave your friends in whatever mess they'd gotten themselves into.

You'd saved them once; you'd just have to save them again.

With that thought propelling you down the highway and onto the mountain roads, you made it straight through to Hometown by the time the sun was setting.

Home sweet home.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Turns out I don't give a hoot about making longer chapters LOL
> 
> Next up: Noelle notices something strange. 
> 
> First you get the tumblr......then you get the money........then you get the WAMEN
> 
> [tellcosy.tumblr.com ](http://tellcosy.tumblr.com)


	12. Day After Tomorrow

 

“Susie!”

You no sooner had your visor up than someone called your name. You sighed and hitched your leg over your bike, pulling your helmet off as you turned to see who had spotted you already. You didn’t have to bother looking, though, since the moment you turned a body leapt on you, knocking you back. 

“Hey, Noelle,” you grunted, holding a hand to the back of her head as she buried her face against your leather jacket. You ignored the way your heart leapt, trying to focus on what you came for. “You okay?”

She jerked back from you so fast her antlers got caught on your hair. At your squawk of pain, she huffed impatiently and muttered, “Okay.  _ Okay _ . She’s asking if I’m  _ okay _ ,” while untangling you. 

“Yeah, I am,” you grumbled, rubbing your sore head and sliding the rest of your hair out of its ponytail. No need for it now, anyway. You only ever wore it while travelling. You hated having it tied back, but getting the headache was better than having your hair whipping all around you on the highway. “Something wrong with me askin’ if you’re okay?”

Noelle’s face suddenly fell. “It’s not that,” she mumbled, before glancing around quickly and giving a tight shake of her head. “C’mon. Let’s walk and talk.”

You glanced around the wild underbrush and ramshackle houses that sat at the edge of town while letting Noelle link her arm in yours and direct you down a side path. You waited a little for her to explain herself, but when she seemed perfectly content to simply walk with you in the warm sun filtering through the trees, you gave her a nudge and said, 

“Any particular reason we’re cuttin’ through the weeds here?”

She waited long enough to answer that you eventually had to just tug on her arm and turn her to face you. She let you stop her, grimacing reluctantly at the forest.

“ _ Noelle _ .”

“Yeah, I know, I just needed to enjoy the silence just for a minute,” she sighed, holding her free hand to her forehead while sliding her other hand to hold yours. You were glad, then, that your hair was down; there would have been no way to hide the flush on your neck, otherwise. She glanced up at you briefly out of the corner of her eye before turning once more to the trees, her hand falling back to her side limply.

“Do you...do you remember a long time ago, when the whole town was locked down because everyone thought that Ariella had been kidnapped?”

You had to dig deep for the memory that Noelle was talking about; your childhood was a huge blur that often felt like wading through molasses to remember anything. Especially about your peers. But you did remember that incident. How could you forget? “Yeah, everyone got super suspicious of everyone else for forever just because the dumb brat ran away from home. Why?”

Noelle worried at her lip, her front teeth digging roughly into her fur. 

She looked back at you, her eyes shiny as though she were holding back tears.

“My mother is missing.”

You took several long moments to process her words, and even once you had, they just bounced around your head, echoing on themselves endlessly. Missing, missing, mother, missing, mother is missing, missing, mother, missing mother— 

“There’s been...talk. About what might have happened.”

That got your attention, quick and honed to a fine point.

“Who?”

She shook her head slowly, her chin closing in on her chest and her voice lowering with each word. “It doesn’t matter who. The point is: I’ve been appointed mayor in her absence, but there’s been talk and it’s not helping anyone. I’m the only thing they have for a leader and I—you know I can’t—”

“Like hell it doesn’t matter who it is,” you bit back, your fist itching to go punch the shit out of whoever had spread gossip around the town again. It had  _ always _ happened in Hometown: someone flapped their stupid gums at the wrong person and suddenly they had to go tell everyone that there was something afoot. 

Nevermind that there might actually be something afoot this time. It wasn’t like they knew that.

“Tell me who they are, Noelle.”

She gave you a tiny quirk of a smile that did very little to appease your righteous indignation. She looked so tired. “Why? So they can make you an outcast again, the second you return?” 

“Who gives a shit what these people think?”

“I do,” she said without hesitation, her face twisting as though she wished her words weren’t true. “Kris does, even if they don’t want to.” At the mention of their name, Noelle’s eyes snapped back to yours before darting around. “Where are they, anyway? Maybe I can appoint them mayor instead and they can talk sense into everyone. They always were great at debating religion.”

You froze.

Noelle noticed immediately, her eyes narrowing. “What? What’s wrong?”

“Kris isn’t here?” Even to you, your voice sounded wrong. Sharp. Hollow.

She shook her head. “No, of course not. I thought you guys had gotten my messages finally and had come to help.”

“I didn’t get any messages from you, Noelle.”

“What? None of them? But I sent like a hundred. I was getting desperate.” Her mouth hung slack as she finished talking, but her eyes were darting across yours while she processed what that meant. “Then, if you didn’t get  _ my _ messages, and you thought Kris was here…”

“Kris left for Hometown almost a month ago. I’ve been trying to reach both of you.” 

You pulled out your phone.

“I got a message from them just last night.”

Noelle took your phone and bent over it, reading the short message aloud. “You were right.” She crooked her head to glance up at you, her hair tumbling over her shoulder. “Right about what?”

You let your neck loosen until your head fell back. Far above, the stars twinkled into existence, even though the sun was still peeking over the horizon.

“I told them it wasn’t a good idea to come back to Hometown.”

Noelle didn’t have anything to say to that, it seemed, as she fell silent for a long while. You simply continued watching the night fall around you. The weak crescent moon hung over the tops of the trees, as though it were an eye laughing down at you.

“Susie…”

You rolled your head to look over at Noelle again, though as soon as you did, you wished you hadn’t. She looked pale and unnerved as she pushed your phone back at you. “Susie, look at the date.”

“What? Why?” you asked, still humouring her even as you protested. “I already told you, they sent it yes...ter...day.”

“You see it, too, right? Please tell me you see it, too.”

“That’s not—how could it—”

But it was. 

The text was timestamped as the day after tomorrow. 

 


	13. Echo

 

“Is it happening again?”

Just before she’d fallen asleep, Noelle had mumbled that.

Was it happening again?

You flicked your lighter open, rolling the pad of your thumb against the wheel. It clicked slowly, chafing your skin in a familiar way.

Was it happening again?

You sighed heavily, pushing the heels of your boots against the parquet porch and swinging yourself gently as you watched the fireflies dancing in the trees. It was hot. Too hot. The air was close and wet and you could almost taste the sun still lingering in it. 

It smelled like magic.

Was it happening again?

You wanted to convince yourself that there was a rational explanation for what had happened—that Noelle’s mother had probably just gotten sick of the pressure of work, that Kris had probably just decided against coming back at the last second, that your phone had just malfunctioned—but your gut knew better.  

Was it happening again?

You wanted to believe that it wasn’t, but you couldn’t quite manage.

The lighter clicked and clicked and clicked, but never sparked.

There was something about the tightness of your skin, the itch in the back of your head.

Kris was gone.

You had to help them. You didn’t have a choice. There never  _ was _ a choice. Even when you were kids, there had never been a choice.

First thing first, though, was convincing Noelle that she had to leave Hometown. You’d tried to convince her several times already that you’d feel better if she was safe at home, but she’d flat-out refused. She wanted to help, no matter if it put her in harm’s way again. She didn’t mind if she got hurt, as long as she could help.

You’d had to bite your lips tight together to keep from telling her that it was  _ because _ she didn’t mind if she got hurt that you wanted her home. You couldn’t stand the thought, but you still couldn’t manage to think of a good enough reason for her to not help you this time.

God, why couldn’t you think of a good reason? Or better yet, why couldn’t she stop being so stupidly heroic? You’d had enough of heroes for a lifetime already.

You slumped back over the swing, ignoring the cobwebs in the corner of the porch that caught on your hair. 

Heroes.

It had been a long time since you’d thought about being a  _ hero _ . You’d done your best to forget, really. All of you had. For over a decade, the three of you had been nothing more than normal people living normal lives. The last person to call you that had been…

Your hand stilled on the lighter.

Ralsei.

The last person to call you that had been Ralsei.

“Fuck.”

It was happening again.

Oh, you were so  _ stupid _ .

You leaned forward again, feet itching to run to the school. You couldn’t leave, though. You couldn’t leave Noelle here in this house all alone, with the ghosts of her parents hanging over her. Her exhaustion had been painfully clear to you as you’d eaten dinner, and now that you knew she’d needed your help this whole time but hadn’t been able to get through to you, you  _ couldn’t _ leave her to do it all herself again. Everyone in town was looking to her to make all the tough decisions, but in a lot of ways, Noelle was still just that girl who always brought extra pencils to school for everyone to use. She’d grown up a lot—all of you had—but out of the three of you, she’d somehow managed to come out of it with some of her sweetness still intact.

It was just another thing out of the hundreds that kept making you fall deeper in love with her.  

Which was why you couldn’t leave her, despite knowing deep in your gut that Kris had somehow managed to go back to the Dark World. For what reason, and how, you weren’t sure. You’d thought that you’d managed to fully cut off the two worlds from each other, after what had happened. But you’d thought about it and thought about it and to you, it was the only thing that made sense. Kris wouldn’t have just left without telling you where they were headed, even assuming they wouldn’t have just come back home. The chances of someone kidnapping them were…low. Monsters didn’t do that kind of thing and the one time a human had tried to mug the two of you, the guy had run off howling about demons as soon as he’d seen Kris’s eyes.

Humans were weird. They would happily kill each other and monsters without a thought, but the second they thought that something supernatural was coming for them, they spooked.

Right now, though, you were grateful for their superstitions, as it meant that Kris would be safe, wherever they were. Even if they had decided out of the blue to go somewhere else, no one would bother them, and if they had fallen back into the Dark World, well—there was still at least one person there who cared about them.

Still. You wanted desperately to get to them and know for certain that they were okay. You’d let them do this despite knowing it was a bad idea; if anything  _ had _ happened, you’d never forgive yourself.

Just like you’d never forgive yourself if you left Noelle right now, as she slept peacefully for what was probably the first time in over a month.

And so you sat tense and frustrated, pulled between two needs as the moon crept across the sky, and waited.

 


	14. Missing

 

“Noe—I mean, Miss Holi—I mean, Mayor Holiday—”

“Just Noelle is fine, Manila,” Noelle sighed as she dropped her spoon back into her bowl and turned to face the fidgeting monster who had interrupted. “What’s wrong? If it’s Horace trying to pressure you to finish the monthly report again, please tell him—”

“No, ma’am, it’s just that—a child has gone missing.”

You could see the words wash over Noelle, bit by bit, until they sank in like rocks in a pool. “When? Who?” she asked in a voice barely above a whisper. You wanted badly to take her hand, but you also didn’t want to make who you could only assume was her secretary even more twitchy. She was already edging away from you as much as she could, the fingernails on her head tapping and digging into her palm nervously at your stare.

Good to know that no one would ever forget anything in this town.

“Little Briar Plante. Her parents are beside themselves; she disappeared out of her bed overnight.”

When you noticed how hard Noelle gripped her spoon, and how a slight rattle came from it tapping against the bowl, you threw caution to the wind and reached over to pull the spoon away and replace it with your hand.

You’d never really cared what anyone in Hometown thought, anyway.

Noelle gave an almost inaudible sigh at the squeeze of your hand, throwing a tiny, grateful smile your way before turning back to her secretary. “Any clues as to where she might have gone?”

“None, ma’am,” Manila said, her head clenching and relaxing repeatedly. “Other than a window that her parents swear was not left unlocked being open in the morning.”

“Have the police already started looking for her?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good,” Noelle said grimly. “Put out word that we’re looking for volunteers for a search party, as well, please.”

“Yes, ma’am, I’ll go right now.”

“Thank you, Manila. Please don’t forget to eat breakfast, though. We’ll all need our strength just in case.”

“I will, Noelle,” Manila said, her voice tinged with fondness, though it was still rough. She hesitated as she turned to leave, her fingers curling forward. “And I—I know it may not be my place to ask you not to, but please—for the sake of Hometown—don’t go looking for her yourself. There’s no telling what has happened, and after your mother, as well…”

“Don’t worry about it,” you said suddenly, startling the woman. You cleared your throat, making sure to speak a little less harshly. You knew how nervous the people in Hometown could be, especially of you. “I just meant that I’ll go look instead.”

Manila’s head went a bit slack. “Are…you sure?”

“Yeah,” you said quickly before Noelle could jump in to disagree. You could see her winding up for an argument out of the corner of your eye, so you said to Manila, “I’ll go look for her in the fields. Noelle can give you my number, just in case anyone needs me or I find her.” You could tell that the woman wanted desperately to think of a reason for you to not go, but in the end, she just nodded and left.

It wasn’t even a moment after the door clicked shut that Noelle snapped, “Are you  _ serious _ ?”

“Look, I know you want to go out and be the hero again—”

“Well, no, it has nothing to do with being a hero, so that part is already wrong.”

You couldn’t help but grin at the prim annoyance in her voice. “Noelle, come on. You know she’s right. The town needs you to be here.”

“They don’t. Trust me. I’ve been solving these people’s problems for a while now and believe me when I say they don’t,” she said, pushing back her chair with a scrape and standing. The look she gave you was the same she’d had when bringing home a kitten who had been hiding under a car at work. You’d lost that discussion and you already knew you were going to lose this discussion, too. “Susie, I’m going with you. You know everyone will want to go looking for Briar, so it’s not like anything else will get done anyway.”

She was right. She was basically always right. You took a deep breath and puffed it out up at your forehead, ruffling your hair. “Fine. It’s not like I can really tell you not to when there’s a lost kid out there.”

“Exactly,” she said, throwing a jacket on over her dress. You watched her with a weak grimace; you were already boiling hot and it was only late morning. You had no idea how she managed to wear so much in the summer, but she always had. She caught sight of your look and clicked her tongue with a tiny smile. “Just because not everyone has lava for blood like you do…”

“Ha ha.”

The two of you set off within a few minutes, Noelle checking out the back door for anybody who might be watching before scuttling out towards the forest edge. You fell into a comfortable, easy walking rhythm as soon as you both hit the worn trail in the forest that lead to the fields down in the valley. You kept your eyes and ears peeled for any sign of the kid, but for a while there was nothing. The trail was long and winding and familiar under your feet; you’d spent many nights wandering this path when you were young. Back in the days when the homesick ache in your gut would gnaw at you day and night, raw and overwhelming. Back in the days when everyone thought you were just a bad kid.

Now only most of them thought that.

“See anything yet?”

“Nah,” you answered automatically, kicking at a big rock that jutted out of the path. You almost started drifting back into your thoughts of Hometown when Noelle’s tone finally clicked in your head and you looked over. Sure enough, she was gnawing away at her lip, eyes sharp and narrowed with worry as they darted around the trees. “Hey,” you said to get her attention on you. When she looked over, you dredged up a smile. “It’ll be alright. She’ll be alright.”

“I...I know,” Noelle said with a bit of hesitation, her fingers fiddling with the zipper on her coat. She seemed a little more relaxed now, though, as she returned your smile, forced as it was.

“She’s only a tiny kid,” you continued, hoping to keep that smile on her face as long as possible. “She really couldn’t walk far, you know. She probably thought she saw a human and wanted to go meet it. Kids talked about doing that stuff all the time when we were young.”

“Mm,” Noelle hummed noncommittally, tucking her hands into her pockets and looking out into the trees again. They were thinning, now, and dotted with low berry bushes and thick flower patches all around. You were getting close to the fields. The sun had reached its pinnacle, blinding you as it shone through the sparse canopy. “Maybe. But ever since I came back…”

“Yeah?” you prompted when she trailed off and went silent for a while. She glanced over at you with a nervous twist of her mouth.

“Well, you know how everyone thought back then that humans were just kind of weird and harmless? Just something for the city folk to deal with?”

“Yeah.”

Noelle reached out to run her fingers along the bark of an evergreen and snatch up one of its needles, holding it up to her nose to smell. “Well, lately, I’ve been hearing a lot of whispers about how maybe all of the problems we’ve been having—like lost food shipments, a dead animal in the well, a fire starting in the old cabin out here in the woods, stuff like that—have been because of…”

“Humans?”

“Mmhm,” Noelle mumbled guiltily, her eyes scanning the trees again.

“What a bunch of bullshit. People in Hometown wouldn’t know a human from a hole in the ground. Remember when Kris wore those horns and some people actually thought that a new monster kid had moved into town?”

“Yeah…”

You turned to look at her again, noting the way her shoulders still hunched. “But…?”

She met your eyes with a tiny wince, her brows turned up in the middle. “But what if they’re right, Sus? You know how humans are. There’s no way to tell if they  _ haven’t _ done that stuff, because it’s actually something they would do.”

“Really?” you asked, more than a little surprised that Noelle was putting any stock in what the people of Hometown had to say, considering how happy she was to be away from them. “You really think that some human would go to all that trouble to poison a well, intercept a delivery van, and commit arson for—what? Just to annoy a tiny monster village hidden away from everyone and everything?”

“Maybe!” she said, tossing her hands in frustration. She let them fall back to her sides before blowing air across her face, obviously trying to calm down. “I just don’t know, Sus, and that’s the problem. It seems a little too convenient for the town to have not just  _ that _ much bad luck, but for there to be  _ three _ disappearances so close together.”

“Technically two, since Kris might not have  _ actually _ come here,” you said without thinking. When you saw the look she gave you, you cleared your throat and continued, “Not saying you’re wrong. I do think it’s really weird and I want to help you figure out what’s going on. But I just think it would be strange for a human to be able to do all this without anyone—”

“Help! Momma!  _ Momma _ ! Help me!”

Your heart clamped tight at the sound of the child’s cry coming from the sunflower fields just below you, and from the look on Noelle’s face, hers must have been doing the same. You exchanged a single glance before both of you shot off into the fields, ducking and slapping away the flowers as you charged through them. Every second you couldn’t see the child, every cry for help that pierced straight through you, made you run faster, look closer, listen harder, until the moment that you crashed straight through to a clearing. 

You took in several things at once: Noelle was not with you, there was a massive hole in the ground, and clinging to its edge was the lost little girl, Briar. Your breath caught and for a single moment you froze, panicked at the sight of a child so close to death. Then you sprang into action, leaping down to grasp at the child’s arms, saying over her sobs and squeals,

“It’s okay! I gotcha! It’s okay, you’re okay!”

“I’m scared!” the little girl cried, her hands shifting from the wet grass to your arms. “I’m gonna fall!”

“No you’re not, honey, I’ve got you, I’ve got you,” you repeated, digging your knees into the ground and trying to lift the girl up. As soon as you pulled her shoulders above the lip of the hole, though, she let loose a scream loud enough to make your ears ring. You nearly loosened your grip, you were so shocked, but luckily your instincts kept your hands clamped on her. “What? What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

“My—my roots! They’re stuck! It hurts, it  _ hurts _ !”

Your breath was coming fast, now, adrenaline pumping through you. “You’re gonna have to try to get them loose, hon, I don’t want to hurt you when I lift you up.”

“Can’t! They’re stuck!”

“Okay,” you grunted, shifting your position to lean forward a bit. You couldn’t see anything below her—not even her legs. It was as if the darkness was a physical presence that was trying to swallow her whole. “Okay. Briar?”

The little girl didn’t respond, her face buried against the soil as she wailed in fear. 

“Briar.”

Something in your voice must have been serious enough to get her attention, as she looked up at you with watery green eyes. 

“Briar, I’m going to try to wiggle you loose, okay? It’s going to feel like I’m letting you drop—” She whimpered in fear and you finished quickly, “—but I’m not going to, okay?”

“O-okay.”

“Okay. Here goes.”

With only a moment to take a quick breath and hold it, you lowered the girl slowly, slowly, until you could no longer feel tension between her and the ground. Your muscles complained loudly as you leaned even further forward, dangling the girl as you tried to wiggle her legs free of whatever had caught them. You breathed a brief sigh of relief when you tried lifting her again with a great heave and there wasn’t a resulting scream from the girl. 

“Alright. Alright. I think that worked, huh? Looks good. I’ve gotcha,” you rambled as you gently dragged the girl upwards, not sure if it was more for your benefit or hers. “Don’t worry, Briar, I’ve got ya. You’re doing great. You’re being very brave, very--”

No scream, at least, until something tugged at her hard enough to make you fall forward onto your stomach, your body now half into the hole as well.

“Noelle!” you shouted over the girl’s terrified screams of, “It’s got me! It’s got my legs!” as you wedged yourself against the lip as hard as you could. You groaned in pain, your shoulder threatening to pop out of place as you held on through another rough tug from below. “ _ Let go of her _ !” you roared into the pit, straining all your muscles to lift the girl. “ _ Noelle _ !”

“I’m here, I’m here, I’ve got you!” came the sweetest voice you’d ever heard as arms wrapped around your stomach from behind. “I’ve got you! I won’t let you fall!”

“Something’s pulling her down, Noelle!”

“I know, I saw! I’m here now, though! We can do this together!”

“Okay—on three,” you groaned, taking several quick breaths to ready yourself. “One. Two. Three!”

At your mark, you heaved upwards, your back and knees screaming with the strain. Noelle’s arms dug into your gut, sending spikes of nausea through you. Your breath was ragged and fast as you pulled and pulled and pulled until finally,  _ finally _ — 

Wails filled the air as the three of you collapsed at the edge of the hole, the girl held safe between you and Noelle. She was sobbing now, face turned to the earth and leaves curled away from the sun. You felt like you should be comforting her, but you were numb with the adrenaline that still coursed through you. It made you dumb; thick and slow and stupid even though you’d been fast as a whip just moments before, as you ran through the fields. 

Had it only been moments?

Time was strange for you now. Slowing to a crawl with each drag of your breath that pushed the whites around your eyes back, back, until you could see the sunset again without static. Speeding up with each sob and sniffle and hushed whisper as Noelle comforted the child, her head bent over the girl and arms wrapped tight. It made the air on your skin pulse with a staccato sort of beat, unbearable and squirming. 

You realised that your leg still hung over the edge of the hole, and you yanked it out with a speed that almost made you ashamed. 

You were the first to stand up, unwilling to stay where you were despite your self-assurances that you weren’t afraid of a  _ hole _ , for chrissake. You helped Noelle up and hoisted the little girl onto your shoulders, patting her hands that wrapped tight around your head. You were moving on autopilot as Noelle took the lead, pushing through the flowers once more as you took each step as it came. One foot in front of the other until your eyes no longer darted around you, searching for anything that might be following.

Noelle’s nervous chatter filled the dense air the whole way home, bringing you back step by step, until you could breathe again, and time stopped beating like a heart against your skin.

You were fine.

Nothing was chasing you.

You didn’t need to be ready for a fight.

Nothing was wrong.

And if your skin crawled and tightened at the sight of the sunflower fields down below when you made a turn on the path that gave you a clear view, you could blame it on the sudden chill in the air.

Nothing was wrong.

 


	15. Town Meeting

 

There was a call for a town meeting that night, agreed upon unanimously despite Noelle asking everyone to simply get some sleep and try to calm down.

You stood at the rear of the meeting hall, your back tucked into an alcove. You knew you must look every bit of the troublemaker that everyone thought you were, with your ripped jeans and arms crossed over your chest as you glared out at them, but you were too annoyed to give a shit.

There was no need for a meeting. Nobody who’d actually been involved in the incident wanted a meeting. The parents of the girl just wanted to let her rest and recoup and be with their kid. Noelle was tired and felt guilty, for some reason. She was trying to hide how responsible she felt, but you could see it in her eyes. She blamed herself, and you wanted nothing more than to take her back home and talk her down from whatever shit she’d managed to convince herself of.

But the townspeople had gathered up and rung the bell and that was that, just like it always had been.

Noelle stood behind the podium, eyes closed and brow furrowed as she waited for everyone to settle down in their seats. Manila fidgeted behind her, clearly wishing she could comfort her but refusing to for some reason. The crowd of people clucked and flapped about, acting as if the meeting was more of a social than an emergency discussion.

Your teeth creaked, ground together hard enough to make your cheeks burn.

Noelle didn’t need you to go cracking these bumblefucks’ heads together. It wouldn’t make anything better.

“If everyone could please—settle down—” Noelle began softly, her voice a little rough around the edges. “Please, everyone—I’d like to start the meeting if we could.” She couldn’t quite keep the exhaustion hidden, it seemed. Not for the first time, you wondered why she put up with this shit. She had a good job in the city. She was smart, and kind, and strong when she needed to be. But when she was in this town, something in her changed. Just like Kris, she reverted back to the kid she’d been before. The girl who had sat in the rain, locked outside the gates of her house and dutifully ignored how the water soaked into her clothes. She’d always smiled and waved at you, if she noticed you watching.

You had always watched.

You’d watched, and you’d burned with anger.

Kids like you knew it well, but a girl who lived in a goddamn mansion should never have to know that sinking in your gut when you realised that the weather report had been wrong. 

She deserved better.

Back then, you hadn’t been able to do anything more than watch, and be angry. 

Now, though…

“Hey!” you barked out over the din of the crowd, watching as everyone froze or spun around to stare wide-eyed at you in turn. You stood taller, drawing yourself up to your full size. “Sit down. Be quiet. The meeting is starting.”

A surprised hush fell over the room before everyone simply obeyed without complaint, turning to sit and look up to where Noelle waited, their faces a mixture between nervous and embarrassed. 

Good. They should be embarrassed.

You gave Noelle a little shrug when her lips twitched up as she watched you. Sorry, not sorry, was what you were aiming to say with it, and she seemed to get the message. Her smile widened minutely, and she got the meeting started without a hitch after that. 

You only listened with half an ear as she explained to everyone what had happened earlier, having already gotten the HD experience yourself. You slumped into your corner a bit, scraping a nail along your jaw absently. There was a large, ugly scratch there, now. You weren’t sure how you’d gotten it, but considering you’d had your face mashed into the ground, you could guess. You should really get some disinfectant for it. Noelle hadn’t been able to find any earlier, so you’d offered to go get some more, but the shop had been shut early. It didn’t matter, really. You’d had a lot worse than that in your life and had been just fine. Monsters didn’t get infections the same way that humans did. It could still happen, but unless they lived in total squalour, a scratch like that normally wouldn’t be a problem.

“So as I’ve already said, we’ll be fine to just get some rest now, I think. Briar is doing well back with her parents. That’s all.”

“Hold up there, Noe—” a blob-bodied man began, stopping himself both mid-sentence and -stand, crouched there like a deer in headlights at the sharp look Noelle was giving him. “Mayor Holiday,” he finished carefully, standing up with a huff of effort. Noelle nodded stiffly to let him know he could have the floor. “I think I speak for everyone when I say that enough is enough. We’ve all been patient—you can’t deny that, we’ve been real patient, even through what your mother done and now you having to adjust—but enough is  _ enough _ . There’s just too many ‘coincidences’ lately,  and we’re sick of being afraid in our own town.”

There was a rumble of agreement that spread through the people. You watched as some of them nodded solemnly and some of them crossed their arms nervously.

Your eyes narrowed.

“I’m always open for suggestions, Steven,” Noelle said, her voice even but weary.

The man shifted his weight back and forth for a moment before adjusting his hat and saying, “Some of us have been talking and we’ve all agreed that we would feel better if there was...someone watching. Just in case.”

Noelle waited to speak until the hums and grunts from the group quieted, tapping her fingers on the podium. When she did, she swept her eyes across them all. “Understandable. It’s a reasonable request. But I need more than that before I can look into putting it into action. What  _ exactly _ is this group of yours wanting? More police? A specialty guard?” She paused significantly, and when she continued, her voice made it clear that she understood exactly what the group was thinking. “Or a hunter.”

The man had the grace to wobble with embarrassment before he simply plopped back down in his chair.

Noelle watched him, her face grim. “Thank you for your suggestion, Steven. I appreciate that you are trying to help our community through these difficult times. Please feel free to come back to me with another, more detailed request once your group has decided. For now, as it’s quite late already, I feel it would be best that we adjourn—”

“I’ll do it.”

You almost looked around with the rest of the group to see who had spoken, but you were too shocked at your own impulsiveness to do more than freeze up. Noelle blinked over at you, and everyone followed her line of sight until the entire room’s eye was on you. 

“Pardon?”

You took a deep breath and decided in a single moment to double down. You squared your shoulders, taking a step forward out of the shadows and speaking clearly. “I said I’ll do it.”

“Do...what?” Noelle asked, her eyes pleading with you to just stop talking. You could only twitch your brows upwards to let her know that you were sorry, but that wasn’t going to happen.

“Patrol. Guard the town. Make sure nothing like this happens again.”

You could only describe the silence that fell over the room then as tight. Coiled like a spring, wary and ready to pop with only the barest of nudges. It made the thoughts of everyone clear as crystal, and you could only smile.

“I—see. It’s very generous of you to offer. I—I suppose if there’s no objections...?” Noelle stumbled over her words, looking out to the crowd as if hoping that someone,  _ anyone _ would break their silence. When nobody moved so much as a muscle, she made a tiny, high whine in the back of her nose and said, “If there are no objections, then I suppose I have to accept your offer.”

“I know y’do,” you said with a wider smile intended more for the crowd than for Noelle. You really were sorry that you were putting her on the spot like this, but that wasn’t going to stop you from getting yourself in the exact position you wanted to be in.

With only a few more words to close out the meeting, Noelle rapped her knuckles on the podium and scurried down the stairs with a sharp glance at you that clearly meant you should follow. You cleared your throat and nodded at the few people who still hadn’t stopped watching you, despite most of the crowd getting to their feet. As soon as you made to leave, though, a body stepped in front of you, blocking your exit. The thumb that you had hooked into your belt loop crooked tight in the fabric, the burn of pain enough to keep you from snapping at the person to move.

You were especially glad for the distraction once you looked up and realised that it was Kris’s mother who had stopped you.

“Susie,” she said with her soft, comforting voice that rankled in its efficacy. You didn’t want to be comforted by anyone, and doubly not by her, of all people. “It’s been a long time. It’s good to see you well.”

“Nnhn,” you grunted, staring over her shoulder to where Noelle was walking into view, tying her hair into a loose braid. 

“I...don’t suppose Kris came with you?”

Your eyes snapped back to Toriel’s, narrow. “Do you  _ see _ them next to me?” Toriel seemed taken aback at the venom in your voice, and you sighed, taking pity on the older woman. “They ain’t here, Tori.”

“Aren’t.”

You gave her an unimpressed look. “After all these years?”

She smiled gently in that way that used to make you sick with jealousy when you watched her talking to Kris’s brother. “Once a teacher, always a teacher, I suppose.”

“Hunh,” you huffed out, eyes sliding back over to Noelle, who had spotted you and was tapping her watch impatiently. The effect was diminished by the fond smile she wore. “Maybe try teaching yourself to use the phone every once in a while.”

“I’m sorry?”

“You heard me,” you snapped back impatiently. You tightened the loop around your finger, reminding yourself that Kris still loved this woman.

“I—I did try to call them. I wanted to know if they were going to come back up, since As—” She stopped abruptly at the look you levelled at her, clearly rethought what she was going to say, and finished with, “They didn’t answer.”  

“Can ya blame them?”

Toriel’s face fell, then, and you didn’t even feel a little bad about it.

“No, I—I suppose I can’t.”

Silence fell long enough that you considered just pushing past her to get to Noelle, but before your fuck-it switch flipped, she mumbled, 

“Just...if you could. Let Kris know that we miss them. And we hope they’ll at least come home for—to see—”

You waited for her to get the balls to say his name, eyes wide and unblinking, but she looked away, conceding without a fight.

You ground out a sigh.

“We just want them to come home.”

“Tell them yourself, Toriel. I’m not your messenger boy.” With that, you pushed past her, taking a few steps out onto the pavement before her words managed to stab their claws into your mind and make you jolt to a stop. You told yourself that it wasn’t worth it; that she didn’t even know that she’d said something inconsiderate. That even if you said what you wanted to say, she wouldn’t understand why it was important enough to be said.

You had a hundred reasons not to say it, but the one reason you had  _ to _ say it was enough. Before you could stop yourself, you turned and threw over your shoulder,

“But if you’re asking them to come home, I’d rethink my words if I were you.”

Toriel’s brows turned up in the middle, her eyes wary but attentive.

“This isn’t their home anymore.”

You didn’t wait to see what effect your words had on her. You simply turned your back and headed in Noelle’s direction, feeling lighter for having said them.

 


	16. Footprints

 

“Shouldn’t we have told her that Kris is missing?”

You glanced up at Noelle over your mouthful of dinner. 

“No.”

She grimaced, guilt written all over her face. 

You swallowed, sitting back and raising your brows. “Why—do you think we should’ve?”

“Maybe.” She shrugged a shoulder, head tucked down. You just watched her as you ate, waiting. She fiddled with her food for a few minutes, her mouth expressing her thought process without ever saying a word. She pouted it out at first, blowing her cheeks wide as she looked down to the plate of food. The lips rounded as she blew out a long gust of breath that she’d held. Her teeth gnawed and chewed and twisted her lips as she looked up to the ceiling, eyes closed. Finally, they went thin and tense at the sides as she looked back to you, eyes matching their intensity. “Yes.”

“Okay,” you said simply, unable to keep the smile off your face. 

“A mother deserves to know when her child—what?” She blinked, cutting herself off mid-rant.

“I said okay.”

“Just...okay? Just like that? I thought you hated Toriel.”

You sighed. “I don’t hate her.” You rolled your shoulders in an approximation of a shrug that had a smidge too much apathy to be called that. “She pisses me off, sure. But I don’t hate her. If I hated everyone who pissed me off, I’d be a lot busier.”

“Why? What would you have to do differently if you—you know, nevermind,” she said as you chuckled. She shook her head. “Still. I didn’t think you’d agree to telling her so easily.”

“Oh, I didn’t agree to  _ me _ telling her,” you said, popping the last bite of food into your mouth with a wide smile.

“Wh—oh, you sneaky bitch,” she said, giving you a light kick under the table as you laughed.

“Language, Mayor Holiday. What if the children were to hear you?” you teased, standing up to put your plate in the sink. 

“The kids know more swears than I ever will,” Noelle muttered, tucking into her food finally.

“Ain’t that the truth.”

Her eyes followed you as you shrugged into your jacket. “Going somewhere?”

“Got a job to do, remember.”

“I do, unfortunately,” she grumbled, her fingers playing with the end of her braid as she took a sullen bite of food. She chewed for a second before speaking behind her hand, her fork flopping down. “You really don’t have to do this, you know. They’ll cool off eventually, even without a ‘guard.’”

“Well that’s good, since I don’t really plan on doing any actual guarding.”

Noelle looked surprised. When she’d ranted about the meeting to you, before, you’d just let her assume that you’d offered to do the job to help her out. She’d only needed to vent out her frustrations with the situation, and wasn’t actually upset with you at all, so you felt it was unnecessary to bring it up yet. It was always better to let Noelle talk her aggressions out before piling more on, you’d found.

“What—why did you volunteer, then?”

“I just wanted an easy excuse for why I’d be poking around the town,” you explained, twisting your hair up into a looped ponytail so it would be out of your way. God, it was hot in your coat. But if you were going to be walking out in the woods at night, you wanted some protection from thorns and burrs for your arms, too.

“Oh, you really are a sneaky bitch,” Noelle said, sounding genuinely impressed. She began eating quickly, saying around her food, “Just gimme a sec to finish this and I’ll come with.”

“Don’t think so, Lady Mayor,” you said, already heading for the door. Noelle spluttered and jumped up after you, almost tripping on her slippers in the process. You caught her with a laugh, shaking your head at her protests. “Noelle, come on. You already hung off the edge of a cliff today. Give my heart a break, wouldja.”

You were surprised to see her eyes go wide and her cheeks colour, but you realised that you were holding her arms a little tight, and let them go. “Sorry.”

She didn’t seem to have anything to say to that, so you just flipped down your collar and shrugged your jacket higher, checking your pockets to be sure you had everything. “Just take the night off. Watch something stupid. Read one of your sappy books. I’ll be back before you know it.”

Noelle snatched at your sleeve, looking up at you with worry etched into her face. “What if you aren’t?”

You searched her eyes before giving her a tiny wry smile. “Then you’ll probably have more to worry about than telling Toriel about Kris.”

“ _ Susie _ .”

You took a quick breath through your nose before nodding. “Yeah, I know. But don’t worry, Noelle. Really. I’ll be fine. I just—I have to do this. I have to find them.”

It was Noelle’s turn to search your face. Eventually, she seemed to find whatever she was looking for, as she sighed and stepped back, letting you go. “I know.” She ducked her head for a second before looking up at you through her lashes, sad and tired. “Be safe, Susie. Be safe, and bring them back.”

You just crooked a smile and said, “I always do,” before slipping out into the night.

It hit you almost as soon as you’d taken the first step away from Noelle’s house that your plan was not a good plan.

It wasn’t even a decent plan.

It wasn’t even a plan.

All it was, you realised with a sinking stomach, was the vague notion that Kris might be in the Dark World and you should go try to get them back.

But how in the hell were you supposed to do that?

You’d all done your best—sacrificed and fought tooth and nail—to be sure that the other world could still exist while not being influenced by this one. You’d cut it all off, despite knowing that you’d be leaving one of you behind. You’d only done what had to be done. 

That had never sat well with Kris.

They weren’t good at doing what had to be done, really. They always felt like there should be another way—a backdoor that nobody had noticed that would bring them to the happy ending that they needed so badly. 

But no matter how hard they tried, it had never been found. 

Maybe...maybe until now.

You’d always known that Ralsei was a deeply sore spot for Kris. You’d known he would be from the moment you’d seen his face. Kris had never stood a chance. And when you’d all had to leave him behind, closing both a physical and metaphorical door with him standing on the other side...well. 

You didn’t have a single doubt that Ralsei had been one of the first topics for the doctor to discuss with Kris.

Fuck, even you’d had your own share of trauma. You often dreamt about him. Some of them kind, where all you’d do was shoot the shit about your lives like you’d grown to be close friends over years and years, and were just catching up when you had the chance. Some of them weren’t so kind, though. Nightmares would catch you sometimes, the throbbing menace netting around those happy times and squeezing them until you could only see Ralsei’s face slowly dusting, bit by bit. His eyes were always the last thing to go, watching you silently. It would be easy if all you saw in them was judgement, or blame, or anger. 

But every time, you only saw sadness. A deep, gaping loneliness that swallowed your dreams and left you hollow for days after. 

God, you hated those nights.

You couldn’t even imagine what it had to be like for Kris. 

You let out a rough, growling sigh, giving a rock on the path a swift kick that sent it skidding into the grass.

You hated this.

You hated that you were back in this town. You hated that Kris was missing. You hated that they’d been so torn up by the world that they’d gotten in trouble again. You hated that Noelle was working herself to death for people who weren’t even grateful for it. You hated that something could happen like a little girl wandering off in her sleep and almost falling to her death. You hated the thought that if you had been just a little bit weaker, it wouldn’t have been an almost.

But there was no use in holding on to all that hate. 

Everything that had happened, had already happened, and you couldn’t change anything about that part of it. The only thing you could do was take that raw, burning energy in your gut and funnel it into something else. Something helpful. 

Your mind briefly lit with curiosity about the thought of Briar, even as you picked up the pace towards the school. You had almost immediately pushed the experience to the edges of your thoughts, not wanting to look at how it might be setting off a chain reaction deep inside you. You’d had enough experience dealing with your own traumas by then that you knew there wasn’t going to be anything you could do, if it was going to worm its way inside you. All you could usually do was be aware that it was a possibility and be ready for any strange moods you’d have at random times.

But there was something about this particular moment that didn’t want to be ignored. It circled your thoughts, waiting, watching, ready. There had been enough going on before for you to keep it at bay, but now that you were alone, with nothing but the crickets and cicadas singing in the trees to distract you…

The memory pounced, filling your mind utterly. You took a shaky breath, shoving your hand into your pocket and clicking the lid of your lighter just to feel the movement. 

The darkness was what came back to you first.

Of course it was. Of course it was the thing that hit you hardest.

You’d never had a problem with the dark, before.

But of course it was the thing you remembered now, the thick, impenetrable darkness that swallowed everything like the maw of a beast. It felt familiar and utterly, completely wrong for its familiarity. Like a memory of a dream of a nightmare that kept repeating in a whirl of déjà vu that could sink you as deep as that gaping hole. 

You knew that feeling; every time you tried to think of that face, the one at every dark corner in your mind, you got that feeling.

Better just to not think about it.

But how could you not, now? How could you force it from your mind when it filled every nook, every secret place where you’d hidden those broken parts? 

You just would. 

You didn’t need to think about that hole, right now. Even if you’d felt something emanating from it, something old and alive and more than sentient. You hadn’t thought about it consciously at the time, but some part of you had felt it. There was no denying that you’d felt terrified enough to try to  _ speak _ to it. There was something about it that kept you circling and circling around. 

But you didn’t need to think about it right now. You just needed to get to the school and find how to get to the Dark World and Kris so you could bring them back home safe again. With effort, you pushed the thought of the hole aside, coming back to reality slowly.

Until you realised that instead of being surrounded by houses and buildings on your way to the school, there were flowers. 

You were in the sunflower fields. 

That brought you smashing back into focus and you tensed, looking around you for any sign of where in the fields you might be. 

You already knew.

But you wanted to be wrong.

You wanted so badly to be wrong that your body leaned back even as your feet moved forward. 

But no.

You were right. 

With only a few steps—only a slip between the flowers tall enough to look down at you—you were standing back at the hole.  

A shudder rolled through you involuntarily, and suddenly you couldn’t feel the heat in the air anymore. 

Why were you here?

When had you veered off course from the school? Had you really dwelled so hard on the memory of this that you’d practically sleptwalked? 

The hole loomed.

You watched it warily, taking slow breaths to convince yourself that there was nothing to be afraid of. It was just a goddamn hole. It couldn’t possibly hurt you.

As if to prove it to yourself, you walked closer, circling its perimeter. You kept your eyes on the darkness, jaw clenched at the memory of it gripping the little girl. It couldn’t hurt you. She’d probably just gotten stuck on a rock. It couldn’t hurt you. You couldn’t see down the hole because the moon was at the wrong angle. 

It couldn’t hurt you.

You stopped as your feet met your own footprints in the grass. You’d walked the full circle of it and nothing had happened. You stood in the silence, a little embarrassed at your own superstition. Hadn’t you just been thinking how stupid people were for just that?

Still. You would cut yourself some slack this time, you thought. It wasn’t like you were crossing yourself at the sight of a black cat or whatever. Clearly, you’d just gotten spooked by a child almost dying. Perfectly reasonable.

You crouched down next to the hole, grinning slightly at your skittishness. It really wasn’t like you at all. You were the designated doer-of-creepy-shit for your house, responsible for taking care of stuff the others couldn’t bring themselves to do. You’d scooped up spiders in your bare hands, shooed away angry snakes trying to nest in your closets, investigated countless noises in the middle of the night with nothing but your fists to protect you.

It was almost comical, the thought of you getting scared of a hole in the ground.

“Maybe it’s a subconscious, metaphorical thing,” you muttered to yourself with a laugh. You shook your head as you made to stand up, grunting softly with the effort. God, you really needed to start stretching before working out. Your body was getting tighter with age and it annoyed you. “Fuckin’ lazy muscles, givin’ me shit when I...”

You trailed off mid-gripe, eyes catching on something on the ground. You hadn’t noticed before, so caught up in looking into the hole itself, but there were indentations in the grass just beside your own. Footprints, it seemed. You briefly thought they might just be from Briar, but no. Not a monster’s, probably, as they seemed to be uniform throughout. Shoes. Quite small, comparatively. Not many monsters had feet that small.

Human, then.

Huh. What was a human doing out here? Had they gotten lost while— 

Your brain stuttered with a sudden thought. 

The darkness in the hole was very, very dark. Dark enough that it seemed to swallow up light. With how dark it was, how flatly impenetrable, it almost looked like...a portal.

“Oh, shit,” you said, then again, as if it hadn’t been enough, “Oh,  _ shit _ .”

Kris really had gone to the Dark World again.

Or…had they?

You stopped yourself before you could leap into the hole instinctively, and took a closer look. You really weren’t good at the logic shit—that had always been Kris and Noelle’s thing—but after you double and triple checked, you were  _ pretty _ sure that the footprints didn’t head towards the hole, but away from it, instead.

But...what did that mean?

Had Kris gone to the Dark World—because you were now fully convinced that the hole couldn’t be anything other than a portal to that place—and then come back, all by themself? If so, why had they wandered off further into the fields, towards the thick forest at the foot of the mountain? Surely if they’d managed to get themself back, they would have gone straight to Hometown.

Or at least given you a call.

You understood why they hadn’t responded, now that you knew they’d been in the Dark World, but that didn’t explain why they hadn’t said anything after leaving it. 

Unless they couldn’t.

Noelle had tried to call you from the mountain, as well, and had had no luck getting through. 

Maybe Kris was having the same problem.

Letting out a long, gravelly sigh, you stood straight again, pulling out your phone as you scanned around you. You dialled Kris’s number, holding the phone to your ear as you paced the clearing. Oh, thank god, it was ringing instead of going to voicemail like it had before. You quickened your step, gearing yourself up to absolutely tear into Kris the moment they answered the phone, when you stopped suddenly.

There was a phone ringing behind you.

It was Kris’s ringtone.

You spun around, eyes lighting on it immediately. It sat half-buried under a pile of delicate yellow flowers, completely hidden while its screen was dark. You ran and snatched it up, heart pounding as your eyes took in the number of missed calls and texts. There were the dozens you’d sent, increasingly more and more frustrated with each one. There were just as many from Noelle, though they were kinder in tone. Calls from their doctor, their workplace— 

Toriel really had tried to call.

Something about that made a laugh bubble out of you, high and loud. It sounded manic even to you, but instead of taking the time to calm yourself, you simply turned to the path of footprints and followed them at a dead run. 

  As you ran in the night, you lost the trail to the dark several times, but picked it up further down the road every time. It was as if your body knew exactly where to go as it flew through the fields and forest, feet stomping down the same path that they had, the humid air dragging through your throat with each breath. You slid on wet rocks as you jumped over a stream, got tangled up in a tree’s reaching branches, fell down so many sudden lips in the mountain that you could feel the bruises forming, until you finally hit the end of the trail.

You stood at the edge of a clearing, chest heaving and sweat pouring down your back as you stared up at a place you had never seen before, despite having combed the mountain as a child.

A church.

A giant, sprawling church that seemed impossible to have overlooked, with its severe, grey stone walls and jutting spire atop a belltower. It looked ancient and forgotten, especially with the vines and plants that smothered it, bursting through the mortar to reach to the sky. 

The footsteps lead to the tall gates and beyond them, disappearing in the tall grasses at its base.

You could hardly breathe.

Kris might be in there.

Even while you tried to talk yourself down, to remind yourself that it could have been anybody’s footprints, your legs carried you forward eagerly. You ducked around the wooden gate that hung off its rusted hinge, full of holes that caught your fingers when you grabbed it for balance. You could smell flowers in the air as you moved through the grass, though you couldn’t see where the scent might be coming from. You tried to slide through the crack in the massive doors, but it was too small for you, requiring a flat-handed shove to open it even the little bit more you needed. It groaned like a grandmother forced to get out of her favourite chair, and you had the inexplicable urge to apologise to it.

Your breath grew even softer as you moved into the church proper. The halls seemed to echo every noise back at you louder than it was before, until your ears rang with the thick blanket of silence and piercing footsteps, the jagged breaths and racing heartbeat. You found yourself wandering, but with purpose. 

It was impossible, but…

But…

Your feet knew these halls.

It was impossible, and yet.

Your fingers wanted to touch the stone bricks that crumbled under the weight of age and neglect, wanted to trace the dirt that lined the gas lamps set high on the walls, your eyes flickering with the moonlight that dribbled through the paned glass windows. In it you could almost imagine you saw ghosts in the dust that rose from your footsteps.

You followed the path, and it brought you to a heavy wooden door carved with a design that knocked at your head and forced your eyes to follow the lines.

Only once you had, could you bring your hand to the door and push it open.

All your held breath came back at once, in great, gulping gasps.

“Kris.”

They turned from where they stood at a window behind an imposing desk, their eyes catching yours instantly. 

“ _ Kris _ .”

You strode forward without thinking, taking them in your arms and burying your face against their hair, relief flooding you hard enough to make your fingers tingle.

“Oh, you fucking dumbass,” you mumbled fondly, shaky laughter lining your voice. “You goddamn idiot. What are you doing? Where have you  _ been _ ?”

They stood completely stiff in your arms, just letting you hold them. They waited long enough to respond that you started to pull away, but as soon as you did, they whispered,

“Here. I’ve been here. Waiting.”

You really did pull back, then, shaking your head, unable to keep the enormous smile off your face. “God, I could kill you. What kinda answer is that?”

They just looked up at you. Watching. 

You shook your head again. “Come on. Let’s get you home. You look like shit.”

“Home,” they echoed, their voice distant. You brushed their hair back away from their face, ignoring the twinge of concern that tugged at your heart. They got like this sometimes, especially after having an episode. You were used to it. You just had to give them time.

“Yeah, home. We just gotta stop off at Hometown first and pick up Noelle and my bike, but then we can go. Sound good?”

They seemed to consider that, as though it were a question with any other answer other than hell yes. 

Finally, though, they said quiet enough that you almost missed it, “Yes.”

You never thought something as simple as a yes could make you smile so wide, but you were glad it could when Kris’s mouth twitched upwards in response.

“Come on, butthead. Noelle is gonna freak when she sees what you’ve done to yourself.”

 


	17. Panic

 

The click of the door shutting behind you was barely loud enough to register in your ears, but apparently to a sleeping Noelle, it was loud as a jackhammer. She startled awake with a yelp the moment the door shut, her eyes going wide as she leapt from the rocking chair she’d obviously fallen asleep in.

“Susie? ‘S’at you?” She saw you and smiled blurrily, scrubbing at her face. “Oh, good. I was really worried about you, and I fell asleep reading this stupid book about—I don’t remember, it was really bad—but it gave me a nightmare about being in the fields with you, only this time I couldn’t find you, and I just kept running and running and I was so lost and I could hear you screaming and—”

You could tell the exact moment that she noticed Kris standing behind you, because she made a noise that you could only describe as a squawk. It didn’t take her long to process, though, and before Kris could even throw up their hands to stop her, she had leapt across the room and tackled them in a hug. It looked almost painfully tight, but you still let her hold on to them for several moments before gently guiding her back to give them some space.

“Oh,  _ Kris _ , I’m so glad you’re back! I was—we were both so worried about you!” she cried breathlessly in the way that she did when she was trying to hold back tears. “Oh, you—you’re just—why didn’t you  _ call _ , you  _ idiot _ !”

With that, she lost the fight against her tears, her face scrunching up as she tried not to let them overflow. You wrapped an arm around her shoulders and pulled her into a loose hug, letting her cry against you instead of saying anything else she would regret later. 

“Didn’t have their phone,” you mumbled after a few minutes, explaining the situation for them so they didn’t have to. You glanced over at them, but they were just staring into the house, eyes sweeping across the furniture clinically. “It was laying at the edge of the hole. They must have dropped it.”

  Noelle rubbed at her eyes, leaning back with a grateful smile for you as she pulled herself together again. She turned back to Kris before tutting in a vicious, yet motherly way and walking into the kitchen, coming back after a second with a wet towel. She wiped down Kris’s face as they stared down at her with something akin to horror. You had to bite back a laugh. “What were you doing that got you so dirty? You look like you were rolling down hills in the rain.”

“I—sort of.”

Kris’s voice was breathless in a way that made you wonder if they were actually hurting from something. If it hadn’t been just this side of pained, you would have insisted they go to the doctor and get checked out. Whether if they got injured in the Dark World or here, you knew that it hurt. But they didn’t seem like they were in any physical pain; they didn’t flinch or pull away when Noelle wiped them down, they just seemed uncomfortable. 

Maybe they were just tired.

As soon as the thought occurred to you, you realised that it must be true. Kris had never slept well, and without you or Noelle there to wake them up from their nightmares, they must’ve lost even more than usual. 

“Hey,” you said gently, patting Noelle’s shoulder lightly. She glanced back at you and you jerked your head towards the bedrooms. “We should get some sleep.”

“Oh,” she said, as if the thought that they might be tired hadn’t occurred to her, either. You smiled softly to alleviate the immediate guilt that washed across her face. “Yeah. You’re right.”

“We’ll get outta here first thing tomorrow.”

“I—what? But—”

The look you gave her made her mouth snap shut again as she looked over to where Kris stood, back ramrod-straight and eyes shadowed. They didn’t notice the two of you looking, having turned their gaze on the ceiling while Noelle cleaned them.

“We’ll talk about it tomorrow.”

You had to concede that. You hadn’t really expected that she would agree to leaving just like that, anyway. You just wanted to let her know that that was still your ultimate goal—getting the three of you the hell out of this town and back to your normal lives.

You gestured Kris ahead of you when Noelle flit around the living room, tidying up a bit before heading down the hallway to the bedrooms. They went slowly, as if their joints were stiff. You watched them with furrowed brows, wondering what exactly had happened to them. They had been completely silent on the way back to town, staring around them intently all through the forest and curious when they reached the edges of Hometown. 

You were unwilling to pressure them into talking about it, but still. You  _ needed _ to ask them what had happened.

Because  _ something _ had.

You looked away guiltily when they glanced back at you, expression making it clear that you’d been caught staring. Still, as soon as they turned forward again, listening to Noelle chatter about what had been happening, you went right back to it.

You couldn’t help it. Once you’d noticed, you had to watch. Had to be sure you weren’t just imagining it.

But no, you weren’t.

They walked differently.

Not by much. 

But enough that someone who had known them nearly their entire life would notice.

You didn’t get much time to study what exactly was different, though, before Noelle was bustling them into one of the guest beds in the same room as yours. You’d barely slept on your own, but you would make an effort that night. Not only would you have to argue your point for leaving in the morning, but you’d have to drive the three of you back after. You didn’t want to risk being less than alert when you had passengers. Especially these passengers.

So with a quick goodnight to Noelle and a wave as you watched her stumble sleepily into her room, you turned back to your room, limbs heavy with the promise of rest. 

You’d done it. You’d found Kris and brought them back safely. Everything else—figuring out what had happened to them while they were gone, making sure they hadn’t brought anything back with them, asking if they’d really gone to the Dark World—could wait until tomorrow. You watched them as they scanned the room again, eyes dragging on certain objects as though they were trying to figure something out about them. They seemed unwilling to look at you, even as you tossed the door more, but not fully, closed, and moved over to shut the curtains just a little. The moon still poured into the room despite its thinness, shedding enough light that Kris wouldn’t be uncomfortable.

“C’mon, man, let’s get some sleep,” you mumbled as you shifted past them again, clapping a hand to their shoulder.

They flinched away from you as if they’d forgotten you were there. You blinked down at them before offering a comforting smile and gesturing to the bed instead of touching them again. Their eyes met yours, but slid away, again and again, as though unable to stop themselves from looking despite not wanting to. Your heart burned with the need to ask them if they were okay, but you crunched that down hard. They didn’t need you sticking your fingers in the cut. 

“Come on,” you said again, voice softer. “You’ll need it in the morning. You know how sick you get on that bike. I’ll kill ya if you puke on me cause you haven’t taken care of yourself.”

That seemed to work well enough, and with a tiny twitch of the lips, they moved to the bed that you’d indicated, settling on top of the covers without even undressing. They still had their shoes on, for chrissake, mud and all.

You blinked again, mouth twisting in the barest of frowns, but didn’t say anything. Not like it was gonna be your dry cleaning bill to pay, and if they wanted to sleep like that, you weren’t gonna stop them. They’d always slept in weird ways. Better this than when they’d climbed up and slept on the tall dresser in your apartment. 

You cleared your throat once they’d settled, back towards you, hunched and small in their bed, and sat on the edge of your own bed to undress. You weren’t in the mood to sleep in the heat fully clothed. Once you were stripped enough for comfort, you shuffled under the blanket, kicked your limbs out from underneath it, and closed your eyes.

After what felt like a single blink, you opened them again to find that you’d slept a few hours already. You huffed and rolled away from the light of the clock, trying and failing to get yourself back to sleep. You gave it a good try, twisting and turning in bed for a half hour before giving in. You might as well get up if you were up; no use in kicking around in bed and bothering Kris just to try for a few more hours sleep that would never come.

With a silent sigh, you crept from the room after taking a second to check that Kris was alright. They were fine—still in the same position they’d laid down in hours before. They must have been just as tired as you.

Probably more, if they really had gone to the Dark World.

You rubbed at your face, scratching your hairline lightly before pushing your fingers through it as you wobbled through the hallways. It was that strange part of the night, where everything felt like it was trapped in a bubble out of time. You stood in the middle of the living room for a while, just staring out at the bit of Hometown you could see beyond the driveway. Eventually, you moved past it, slipping out the back door into the garden, where the fireflies danced and the trees shook with the wind.

You took in a deep breath, focusing on the way it filled your body until it capped and stuttered back out, trickling from your mouth and nose. 

You sat heavily on the porch steps, slumping over yourself, elbows barely braced on your knees as you traced the lines of the wood with your eyes. There, you could see a face. A couple embracing. A laughing demon that shifted as you rolled your eyes side to side.

You could see— 

Kris walking through the grass at the side of the house, slow and meandering and ghostly.

Your gaze snapped fully to them as they made their way slowly to the middle of the garden where they stood framed by flowers and drifting fireflies, leaning their head back and tilting their face to the sky.

They just stood there like that while you sat watching, caught, time trickling between you like sand through fingers.

Finally, you took a breath that was loud enough to alert them to your presence, and they jerked around to face you, eyes wide.

You raised a hand in greeting.

They relaxed, but only a little.

You tilted your head to rest against the pillar beside it. “Couldn’t sleep?”

They watched you silently for a moment too many to make you comfortable before nodding stiffly. 

“Y’looked comfy enough.”

Their eyes darted away then back again. “I—I needed—I need to—” You just waited, brows slowly raising the longer it took them to spit out, “I need to use the—the toilet.”

“So you came out here to piss under the moonlight like nature intended?”

“I—I got lost.” 

Silence fell as you studied their face, shadowed though it was with their hunched shoulders. 

They seemed to grow more uncomfortable the longer you went without saying anything, eyes snapping around them as their hand pressed against their sternum as though they were having trouble breathing. Something about that caught your attention in a way that you couldn’t throw. 

They’d been breathless before, too.

_ Were _ they having trouble breathing?

If so, why? Did they have an injury they weren’t telling you about? Had they fully exhausted themselves to the point of collapse? Or...maybe it was a panic attack?

_ Oh _ .

With that realisation, you pushed yourself away from the stairs in one motion and closed the distance between you, taking them in a loose, but firm embrace. You tucked their head under your chin, making sure your breath was even and consistent so they could listen and mimic it.

“It’s okay,” you said quietly, “I’ve got you. You’re back. You’re just you.” You pulled back enough to frame their face with your hands, holding their gaze in yours. They stared up at you, lips parted and breath spiking through it. “Hey. It’s okay. Just look at me. Listen to mine.” You inhaled deeply through your nose and let it out after four counts. They looked confused at first, but after a few breaths seemed to remember what to do, and eventually theirs were even as well. You nodded in satisfaction. “What’s your name?”

“...Kris.”

You hummed in approval. “Where are you?”

“In—a garden.”

“Whose?”

Their eyes darted around you before snapping back to yours. “I—”

You waited for them to calm down again, giving them a chance to remember.

Eventually they choked out, “N—Noelle’s.”

You smiled, but it didn’t seem to comfort them. They stared down at your mouth long enough that you had to give them a little tap on the cheek with your fingertips. “Hey. Up here.” They shifted their gaze again and you asked, “What do you see?”

“You.”

You had to laugh, even though you knew you shouldn’t when they were upset. “Don’t be a smartass when I’m trying to help you.”

“But I…” They sounded as if they were going to earnestly argue their point, but then simply dropped it and looked around them, your hands falling to their shoulders. “Wisteria. Holly. Dahlia. Shovel. Maple tree. The stars.” They paused, their eyes sliding up and up and up almost reluctantly. When they spoke again, it was in a whisper. “The moon.” 

You watched them watching the moon, a strange knot starting in your stomach. After a few moments, you cleared your throat and mumbled, “Good.”

They startled a bit, looking away from the moon quick enough to swing their hair in front of their face. You caught the scent of flowers and something else underneath, something not entirely pleasant or unpleasant. You shook your head to clear it, stepping back to give them space.

“Think you’re alright to do the rest on your own?”

They were completely still for a second before they just nodded, still hiding their face behind their hair. Part of you wanted to keep comforting them, but that wasn’t always the best thing for them. Often, they just needed to be in their own head for a bit after a panic attack, to let themself come back fully. You did, however, give their arm a little squeeze and say,

“Don’t stay up all night. And keep your phone on. Noelle will kill both of us if she found out that I let you just stay out here alone without a way to make sure you’re alright, after what happened.”

That got you a little peek and a tiny smile and you returned it, clapping them on the shoulder and heading back inside. You had to work hard to silence the part of you that always wanted to toss them over your shoulder and keep them safe with you when stuff like this happened. It wasn’t healthy. You trusted Kris and that meant that you had to trust them to take care of themself, too. 

Really, it wasn’t like you should be worried. Even though they’d disappeared to wherever they’d gone for so long, they  _ had _ managed to keep themself safe. They were acting a little weird, but that could be for any number of reasons. Kris was a complicated person sometimes. You just had to trust that they would come to you for help when they needed it.

In the meantime, you would let them have their solitude and get some more sleep in the process. Talking to them had helped loosen something in your own chest and you were feeling sleepy enough to drift off. As you did, you thought about Kris and how you’d ask them to talk about what had happened in the morning. You’d ask them if they’d really gone to the Dark World, and if so, was that the reason that they were acting a little off. 

You weren’t sure if you were hoping if it was or wasn’t.

On the one hand, if it was, you knew how to fix that. Hell,  _ they _ knew how to fix that, but they often needed someone to point it out to them. 

On the other, it did set a disturbing precedent for something that hadn’t happened to them in a very long time.

They’d been fully in control of themself—more or less—ever since you’d moved to the city. Away from Hometown. But if they’d lost a bit of them again…

Ahh, it wasn’t really worth worrying about until it happened, you thought.

You shifted onto your side, pushing your face into the slightly dusty pillow. 

You were just glad that they were back and you and Noelle had been wrong to think that disaster was around the corner again.

With that thought, you curled up on the small bed and willed yourself to sleep, ignoring the twinges of worry that still licked at the edges of your mind.

You’d always have tomorrow to think about them.

 


End file.
